A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have a crush on a person in a power position over me. I find myself thinking of him constantly. It would be risky for him to get involved with me. It appears to me that he is interested. How do I know for sure? Thanks,P.
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female
reader, chachacha  +, writes (15 April 2007):
You should not entertain the thought of going out with someone more senior at work.
It sounds like you are not quite sure whether he likes you or not. You don't really know him and as you say, it is a crush.
If you really really think that it could go somewhere, then you should move jobs, and then ask him out. But that's quite a bit thing to do when you're not sure.
Otherwise, the best thing to do is to distract yourself and try to find someone outside of work.
Remember the old adage: "don't shit where you eat".
Hope that helps
A
female
reader, Pork Hock +, writes (15 April 2007):
If you come onto him or ask him outright he will either dismiss you immediately, then you deal with the heartache and embarrassment, or he will make some arrangement to see you outside of hours? If it seems very easy to him then you know he's done it before, because it all comes to easily with a good/quick answer. You want to ask yourself why, why would he jeopodize his position, his status, his stature to meet with you? You are talking money, benefits, security...he has to really mean it and love you to foregoe all that?
Besides him, do you want to look back and remember oh I did this and that when I was ex-age, life has many many regrets, I know I married at 28, was divorced at 30, I have a little girl and I now have no choice, despite I love her to death. It is hard to explain why I did things I've done.
Don't go for this, see it as flattery and something that shouldn't be DEFINITELY! Keep it as a fantasy in your mind, its often better than the real thing.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2007): I think if he has a power position over you, i.e. he is your boss or teacher or .... that he would be abusing his power to have a romantic relationship with you, it is not appropriate for either of you to get involved this way and will most likely not work out, and one of you will end up losing their position, and if he is in power, it will be you.....so think twice about looking to reciprocate his interest or pursuing a romantic relationship with someone who has the power to fire you....not wise.
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