A
female
age
26-29,
*ora16
writes:Okay. I have a serious problem. I'm 16 and I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years and I seriously love him but lately, I'm becoming slightly attracted to women. It's weird. When I'm with my boyfriend, I have no problems connecting with him. We are both virgins and I'd decided not to have sex until I was married. Last year, I became best friends with a girl who told me she was gay, which made me question my own sexuality. She wasn't attracted to me which hurt a little bit, but I got over it and moved on. Recently, I've become friends with another girl who's been having serious problems with her boyfriend cheating. Some nights, she cries in my arms, (which I love) and the conversations we have are sort of causing me to fall for her. :/ I think about her all day and when I'm with her, another part of me reveals itself. I become sort of virile; more masculine than my normal self and it seems that she likes it. She's never had sex with a girl but was raped by a man multiple times and doesn't think she's ready for sex with a man. Every time I make a sexual comment she seems to like it and recently we had a conversation about her and I possibly having sex. I don't know what to do. I'm attracted to her body, but more about the way she thinks and my obsession with her mind makes me crave her body and want to please her. What should I do about my boyfriend that I'm still deeply in love with and this girl? How would I please my girl in bed if it does work out? thanks.
View related questions:
best friend, both virgins, ready for sex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Dora16 +, writes (26 August 2011):
Dora16 is verified as being by the original poster of the question@FLynn24, with you being a guy, do you believe if I tell my boyfriend how I'm feeling about this girl that he does know, he'll be cool with it? (because I'm not really interested in a threesome) After reading your response, I realize that I wouldn't be able to keep this from him after such a long relationship thus far. So, I'm going to break it off with the girl, which will be awkward, since she is my best friend. Is it considered shady if I break up with him for a while to see where I can go with this girl?
@birdynumnums, Thank you for your response. I'm going to try to stay away from sexual contact with anyone, though this is extremely difficult being a teenager with raging hormones. :)
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2011): First of all... if you are in ANY kind of serious relationship with someone, then sleeping with anyone else, regardless of sexual orientation is a massive no-no.
If you are questioning our sexuality, and I'd be surprised if you weren't at your age and with your experiences so far, then you need to make a clean break with your boyfriend if you are seriously considering experimenting with this girl. It isn't fair to EITHER of them. She'll wonder why you can't commit to her, and HE'LL be devestated to discover that he wasn't enough, and believe me... being cheated on is one thing as a guy, but to find out that your girlfriend is sleeping with a woman is about the biggest hit to a man's ego that you can land.
If you cheat with a guy, then the spurned male can usually get over it by thinking of you being a bitch or the other guy being a total dick, but if it's another woman he begins to wonder what HE did that turned you against men. It's wrong to think that because you have no more control over your sexual orientation than you have over the colour of you skin. But THAT'S what he will think.
Cheating is despicable, no matter who does it, or who they do it with and don't think you can do it without getting caught, you ALWAYS WILL in the end.
So if you are looking to explore you sexuality, then either make a clean break or try and gauge interest in a threesome or something (if done right and with no friends... nothing ruins a friendship faster than sex... threesomes can work wonders in reigniting a guttering fire) with the both of them because to sleep with both of them when one is in the dark about it and trust is being broken is about as low as it gets.
Flynn 24
...............................
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (25 August 2011):
 Well... There is such a thing as the Kinsey scale - but if you are constantly having crushes on girls more than boys; that's a huge 'Hey There' to you. Crushes are a big tell.
Having said that, women tend to move more fluidly into different sexual relationships in their lives than men do. My husband read an article that women will tend to go to any port in a storm for a relationship and that it is a genetic tendency.
You are highly sexually charged at your age, and I applaud you for recognizing the need to take this slowly, considering your confusion. I would try to rein it in a bit and give yourself some time to try to see what it is you want in a relationship, and where you feel happier - sexually speaking. You are young. Sex has responsibilities and baggage. There's no harm in just hanging and dating.
...............................
|
