A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im really starting to crush on this one guy that i go to college with. Ive know him for a year now but i dont really know him that well. I do know that Im attracted to him and he is one of the nicest guys i ever met. Iam interested in getting to know him better. However, he has a few faults. For instance, i really do not like the way he dresses at all, and hes smokes, which is a huge turn off for me. These are the two biggest things but there are a few other things that bother me. Am I being picky and shallow, or do these things really matter? Should I over look them? What should I do with these feelings I have for him?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (18 October 2007):
Being arround second hand smoke is bad for your health. Stay away.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2007): Well it's your choice but know that if you ultimately decide to pursue something with him you have to ACCEPT the way he dresses and the fact that he smokes, you cannot go into it thinking that you will eventually mold him into exactly what you want. Either accept them or don't but don't try to change him. It wouldn't be fair (for either of you).
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, Lila +, writes (18 October 2007):
 You've gotta decide for yourself what is a deal breaker and what's not. I wouldn't go into a relationship alredy knowing there were things about a person I already couldn't stand.Some women have successfully redressed their men,but I wouldn't plan on trying to change anymore than his teeshirts,people are who they are and don't usually change anything about themselves until they want to.
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