A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hey aunts, i am sixteen years old. i have sort of a problem.. i don't want to kiss. i have a boyfriend and we've been dating for about 11 months. i love him so much but about four months into our relationship, i got mono. it made me bed sick for about two months, and my doctor said its probably from swatting spit.. my boyfriend had it but didnt make him sick for a while, so he never knew and then he gave it to me..ever since then i dont want to kiss!! the thought of even kissing anybody, just makes me sick to my stomach. now don't get me wrong i love my boyfriend muchly but i dont know how to get over this..basically we havent kissed for about four months, i told him why and he told me understood because physical affection isnt what made our love so strong.we still have sex, but nope we still don't kiss!!i'm afraid this is going to tear us apart, because he always tries to kiss me (i guess in hopes that i will just get it over with and kiss him again)but i just can't...I HATE KISSING!! how do i get over this, and kiss my boyfriend!!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2009): Not sure I agree....kiss until you get used to it? To get used to something is to eventually manage an otherwise unpleasant experience. Kissing, following that advice, is unpleasant. I mean, why not both spit in a glass and drink it?
Gross, I know, but at least it spares you the nasty experience of discovering a person's lack of oral hygiene and recent ( or not so recent ) diet.
I do agree that kissing isn't the pivotal part of a relationship. It proves nothing except that you both enjoy the taste of each others saliva etc. How magical and dreamy.
Perhaps you will discover some pleasure in it someday, but if you are ever pressured into it as some sort of proof of love or such, then it's time to kiss it ( him ) good-bye.
Meanwhile, there's a lot more to enjoy in life, so go on and have fun!
..and remember, there are no kisses like Hershey's kisses!!
ooops
A
male
reader, PureKadence +, writes (18 June 2009):
Well, first of all, if you really love him, and he loves you back, this shouldn't be too big of a problem. You're both able to express your love physically for each other in other ways. There is nothing essential about kissing, it's just a culture thing. You're able to hug, hold each other, and have sex, which should fulfill your physical expressions of love.
However, if you really want to overcome this, you most likely can. One way of course, is time. Ask him not to try to kiss you for a while, and just don't think about it. Maybe one time when you're in a particularly romantic mood after you haven't thought about it for a long time, you'll be able to kiss him, even just a little at first.
The other way, and more direct, is try getting used to it. Kiss him, even if you don't like it. Assuming you don't literally get sick while kissing him, you just feel sick, you should be fine. The more you kiss him, you'll get used to it, eventually you won't think about the fact you don't like it. Hopefully after a while you'll really enjoy it again and want to kiss him.
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