A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:dear cupid,im really in love with this older guy! his name is jake, only he is 19. and im 14. but he's so hot and he is always flirting with me! he is my neighbor, and whenever my parents go out they ask him to watch me, and whenever he does, he is always flirting with me, like sitting really close to me, and telling me how he likes my makeup, and how he thinks im pretty! he even asks me if i have a boyfriend! i like him a lot, but he has a girlfriend. :(! she is this fat girl and she is only like 4'9 she is so annoying i hate her!! anyway, do you think he likes me? how do i get him to break up with his girlfriend?from,confused girl
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2010): First of all sweety,
I know where you are. An older guy lived in my house for a while and would flirt with me and even (hypathetically) asked me to marry him.
I know it may seem like he is amazing and that it would be a great relationship; but like the others have pointed out; it is ILLEGAL and WRONG. You are only 14 and have a lot of growing up to do. Enjoy being 14, it surely is a great year to flirt with guys your own age and make great friendships...but unless there is some SERIOUS thought and talking with your parents; there should be nothing more.
Be good friends with the guy. (if you can forget out him as a BF type) and embrace this year.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (10 February 2010):
First of all, you'd really be too young as you're under the age of consent. Secondly, he's got a girlfriend, and not matter how much you hate her, he is with her. Don't try to split them up, because if you do, you'll look bad, and later on he'll dump you for someone else. You're better off avoiding this guy to be honest.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (10 February 2010):
 Well first of all you need to realise that he would get into a lot of trouble dating you - I dont know what the legal age of consent is in your state but I am pretty sure it is not 14! Even if you were just "dating", your parents will still not like the idea of a grown man dating their teenage daughter and if anything sexual were to happen between you, he would be in serious trouble i.e. he could be prosecuted for statutory rape. Do you really want that to happen to someone you really like?
I know you like him and that is very sweet, but at the end of the day he is your babysitter (he is babysitting you!) and he has to be nice to you because your parents will be giving him money to watch you. Sitting next to you is not flirting, that is just sitting next to you. If you got on a bus and someone sat on the seat next to you, would you think they are flirting too?! I think not. As for asking if you have a boyfriend, he is just trying to make a conversation with you and talk about your life, this is just a normal conversation. Maybe the make-up thing and telling you that your pretty is a little odd, and yes there may be a tiny bit of flirting but nothing you should really read into.
This guy knows it would be illegal to be with you, he knows it would majorly cause an upset with your family and he has a girlfriend. So he would never be interested in you in the way you want him to be I'm afraid, not until you are a lot older and he is single.
Dont be the type of girl that tries to split other couples up just because you think the guy is "hot" - it is not a nice way to behave and you will only cause problems for yourself. Imagine if you had a boyfriend and then some little girl that is 5 years younger comes along and starts calling you fat and saying she hates you - you would think she is an immature little b***h wouldnt you? Everyone would laugh at her because she is so immature and silly for even trying to come between a couple when the guy isnt even interested in her.
Be the bigger person here - there is no harm in thinking this guy is hot but it cannot go any further. You are too young for him and I'm sure he is happy with his girlfriend so just leave him be. Regardless of what you think of his girlfriend, he is with her for a reason and he must really like her so there is nothing you can do.
Enjoy being his friend and take it no further - there are plenty of guys out there that are more your age and are single, so dont try anything with a guy who doesnt even like you in that way.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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