A
female
age
41-50,
*ostforever
writes:i really need help with this one as soon as possible ( this is very long )... i am in a relationship for almost 4 years with this guy who is really loving and i adore him to bits. we are in two different countries and we hardly meet, so we try to keep in touch via skype and so on. we have our few arguments but nothing is major so far, however recently the topic of my low self esteem comes up during such arguments. so what happened tonight goe like this. i wanted to tell him about my possible job after a phone call from my brother. Me: so i might be working as a technician in a lab.him: what kind of work will that be then? give me more details. Me: ( i explaine to him)Him: "no answer busy with his PSP"Me: so ? Him : what ? you didnt give me details !so i got mad cuz i already did explain to him and i know for sure the reason why he didnt get it is because he is busy with his PSP. but what made me more angry is the fact that he didnt just admit that the reason is the PSP instead he said that i didnt answer his question and provided him with the details.and he said that the reason i got mad is because i have issuem with low self esteem.he blames me for making a elephant out of an ant, was it bad of me to be angry that he didnt admit that the real reason why he didnt listen to me was him being busy with PSP and instead he said it is because i didnt provide the details about my job ?please help me because i dont want to talk to him till i know the answer ...
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female
reader, lostforever +, writes (4 May 2008):
lostforever is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey asksister
i guess what you are saying is correct, and i know it well. but i just wish there is a way i could make him admit for being wrong and apologize for it instead of saying something like : ok, you dont have to repeat what you said if it is so much trouble for you.
is it bad of me to ask of this ? and what should i do if something like this happened again ?
thank you very for your help
A
female
reader, lostforever +, writes (4 May 2008):
lostforever is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni am still in a bad mood and i am worried now, tonight i am supposed to talk to him, but i dont want to because when we end our talk properly before we went offline and i feel that i still need to defend my self and say why i am angry but he wont allow it and wont comment on this topic anymore.
i feel that i have been treated unfairly but i cant do anything about it... i am depressed.
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A
female
reader, lostforever +, writes (4 May 2008):
lostforever is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks alot for those who replaied to my question
Hello (ASK oldersister):
we have been in this one for 4 years and yeah it has been distance because of our circumstances and the fact that we are both in two different countires doing our studies. but through this relationship my boyfriend
has been everything to me and he has been right by my side when ever i needed him sometimes even more than my own family. it is not that he is a jerk or not interested
i just hate the fact that he wont admit to something, which i think it would have saved alot of my energy and non of this would happen.
thanks misty, i really dont think he is not interested. the thing is whenever we have arguments he comes up with solutions that i dont agree too but he tries to fix it anyways no matter what. sometimes i think he is determined to work this out more than i. i just cant seem to be able to hold on to an argument against him and i think it is because of my self esteem and him being the stronger one in our relationship.
Hey Dr venetta thanks for your answer, we are planning to get married and he is working really hard for it. we have met for sure and we are planning ot meet again soon it is just our circumstances that come in the way. and yeah of course we wont be in this relationship forever.
our relationship is not a text computer based one
it is more than that ...
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A
female
reader, misty_2008  +, writes (3 May 2008):
im sorry to say but this guy has shown no intrest in you. its amazing how long you been together, but ask him how he feels about you and if he his silent you know hes not the one. ont he other hand if you love him try you hardest to be with him but if you have ni respond back its time to throw the knife in. hope ive heleped. misty
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A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta +, writes (3 May 2008):
 just curious but. where is this super long distance relationship going? have you met? whose going to move to which country to be closer? are you both going to carry on the long distance into your old age?
best advice : get out meet a real person not some text on a screen. you might not like it but seriously.. you're getting angry at someone who is in another country..
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