A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello, there is no one else i can talk to about what im going to tell. what ive done is illegal and could get me into alot of trouble, here is my story. okay so my cousin moved in with me my brother and my mom at the begginning of the year after being discharged from his care home. at first we found it quite awkward being around each other because of not seeing each other for around ten years and we were both very shy. but eventually we became comfortable and we became very close. as cousins and being the same age both 17 we hung out whenever he werent with my brother and we would have a right laugh. if there was something that i didnt want my mom to know he would cover for me and vice versa, we became not just cousins but friends. But then there was a complication between our friendship. a few weeks ago we both stopped at his moms house(my aunt) who has her own pool house and bar and we had a laugh. my aunt let us have a few beers but we never got drunk. the night was amazing he showed me everything that him and my brother would do to have fun. we never ended up going to bed until around 3 in the morning. we woke about 10.00 am but we were so tired and worn out from the night before we stayed in bed. we talked about our relationships and our partners, and i told him about the trouble i was having with my boyfriend, he comforted me and told me to end it cos hes treating me like a fool. anyway we were still very tired and he asked me to tickle his back because he found it very relaxing so i did not thinking anything was wiered about it, and we took turns tickling each others backs, but then i began to feel abit wierd, well turned on if you like and it was obvious he was too.. we never spoke throughout, and remaining silent while stroking my back i felt his hand go abit lower down until he bagan playing with me, before i knew it we were having sex kissing and everything still not saying a word. after we finished we still didnt speak, well not about that anyway, and to this day we still havent spoke about it.i dont know what to do, none of us do, we know what we did wrong and i will never be able to tell my family about this. it was just a one night stand and will never happen again. but its illegal. i know theres nothing i cam do about it now but if anyone can comment or give me any advice i will be forever grateful thanks..xx
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cousin, discharge, drunk, kissing, moved in, one night stand, shy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, julie123 +, writes (22 November 2009):
I can see that this must be awkward for you emotionally, but on the legal side I think you may be confused:
If you're based in the UK, as the little flag by your name suggests, then it wasn't illegal at all to sleep with your cousin - you were both over 16, and it isn't a crime in Britain to have sex with a cousin, or even marry them.
From your language it sounds like you might be American (a Brit would usually say 'mum' instead of 'mom'), which complicates things - if you're American and living in Britain, then again, no crime committed, but if you're living in the USA then in some States it is illegal to sleep with your first cousin. However, even if it's against the law in your state, since you're both over 16 it is highly unlikely that anyone would punish you for it, even if they found out.
The best plan is to try to stop worrying about it and if possible, chat to your cousin - even if you just agree that you'll both put that night behind you and try to forget it ever happened might put your mind at ease.
Good luck, take care!
A
male
reader, greg290352 +, writes (22 November 2009):
 I'm totally sure sex with cousins in the UK is not illegal. Otherwise half the Royal family would be on a charge!
It's natural for cousins to be attracted to each other quite often.
Stop being so hard on yourself things happen. However you need to consider how the two of you are going to deal with the situation. That means you need to talk!
Good luck :-)
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A
male
reader, CoolAndCoolest  +, writes (22 November 2009):
hmmmm, i think you feel guilty, which could be normal.
i don't know which part of the world you are from. think about the possibility to get married with him.
i don't know about the law in your country.
for me, it was love. and you both feel comfortable at each other. you are the right couple.
or if those are not possible, then forget it. speak to your cousin. both you decide.
DECIDE... that is the word. if ok to get married do that or forget that one night stand. and just keep it as a sweet memory....
let life go on. there is nothing called right and wrong.
all the best.
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A
male
reader, Taero +, writes (22 November 2009):
*shrug* simple to me, you both seemed to be fine with it, sure it's a bit shy of the law as it were but you'd been apart 10 years and didn't have familial ties. I wouldn't let this eat you two up, as long as noone was hurt I don't see the problem. Heck in some places cousins can marry.
I think you should just talk to him, you both probably have the same worry but look at it this way, YOU both do, not anyone else so it's just between the two of you.
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