A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Yesterday I had my annual, I was expecting to get on the Mirena (birth control IUD that last 5 years) but when the dr came back she said that I couldn't get it because I'm not a good candidate for it, being as its for people who are in monogamous relationships, her conclusion came from my pap smear that had came back abnormal. NOW I have been in a serious relationship for the last 3 1/2 years, no outside partners. I was really surprised that she came to that conclusion without even asking me how many sexual partners I've had or anything. This was actually my first pap smear that came back with those results, also the night before my appointment I douched (which your not supposed to but I do after my menstrual each month) now this was last February right when i found out I was pregnant, I was actually not informed about the abnormality because my whole pregnancy i was doing my follow ups with this hospital, going about my appointments with confindence in fact because i thought it was all good. I just dont understand how they didn't go about informing me. Also my question would be my sexual partner list. I have had 12 sexual partners in my lifetime from the time I lost my virginity to now at 23. 16-20 which means i had 3 parnters a year up until 20 when I got into the relationship with my now fiancee. Is that bad?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 August 2012):
 my GP insists on giving me the condom speech every time I see her... I'm 52 and engaged.
last time I saw her I told her this and she said "unless you are married you get the condom speech"... it's just her practice...
as for the abnormal pap smear... very very common...
as for douching... CUT IT OUT.... you do not need to be douching EVER....not unless a doctor prescribes it...the vagina is self cleaning... douching wrecks the PH... if you really really feel you MUST douche... please only use vinegar and water....
as for partners... your past is your past it's not good... it's not bad... it JUST IS.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2012): The average number of sex partners in an American's lifetime is never going to have a clear answer. But the data pretty much always puts it somewhere around 4-8 people. 12 is more than average no matter how you stack it.
Is it BAD to have more partners than average? Well, that is a whole different subject.
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A
male
reader, doublejack +, writes (29 August 2012):
I will first start by saying I'm not a doctor, so don't take this as the only possible explanation. Often an unusual pap smear is caused by HPV, which is the most common STD. It often shows no symptoms in men, but can result in abnormal cells on a woman's cervix, which a pap reveals. Follow up paps are done to verify that things have cleared up, or to see if a surgery is required to remove part of the cervix. Typically when one partner has HPV it is transmitted to the other. However, it would be very unusual for your current partner to have had it the entire 3 1/2 years of the relationship and you just showing signs of it now. HPV symptoms are typically cleared up within 24 months by the body's immune system fighting it off, and since previous pap smears have come back normal then it means you contracted it not long ago. So what your doctor has implied without saying is that you or your partner haven't been monogamous. The only other possibility is that your partner had the virus, but you only got infected fairly recently.As far as the number of partners you had between the ages of 16-20, your past is your past. You can't change it. I'm not going to pass judgement one way or the other. In any event, even if you were promiscuous before it would not cause an abnormal pap smear now, that would have happened years ago.
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