A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Slightly embarrassing but I can't seem to orgasm. My bf and I have been together about 6 months and he has made me orgasm once but it took forever. He does all the right things and I always get so so close but never actually there. Any advice? Is it me or him? I can myself there fairly easily. I know he worries he's not doing it right.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (30 November 2011):
 STOP trying!
seriously.
if you can't orgasm with your partner then do it without him and spend your lovemaking time ENJOYING every other aspect of it.
when he's done if you are not done, then he can "help" you finish yourself off.... there is no CRIME in not having an orgasm during sex....
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2011): Sex isn't all about the ending "O" according to a lot of articles and who done it you're not alone. Quite a high percentage of women can't climax during normal intercourse but through oral or masturbation, my question is what are you doing when you get close, is it oral, heavy petting (fingering) or full on sex? But at the end of the day if the sex is good then don't worry, it's not necessarily a perfomance issue on his part, mabye you could do the deed, then after he's finished he could watch you finish your self off??? Food for thought perhaps???
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A
female
reader, Cloud_comp +, writes (30 November 2011):
First I'd ask, can you make YOURSELF orgasm?If yes, he is doing something wrong or he is making you overexcited or there is some mental block being with another person that is fizzling out your pleasure.If no, you should see a doctor at a women's health center. You could have a buried clitoris that needs a small surgery on it.Still it might also be psychological issue you need to see a therapist about.For years I was too scared to orgasm when I was with a man. I didn't trust them and I did'nt want to let go of myself. I also found being sexual so stimulating I couldn't concentrate on myself PLUS I was taught that my bits were dirty and naughty. So having a man touch them or put his mouth on them was VERY hard for me. Women really need to be relaxed and focused and comfortable with sex to find that elusive mutual orgasm.
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A
female
reader, synchrohobbit +, writes (30 November 2011):
 Well, he is probably doing something very differently than you are if you can orgasm quickly by yourself but have so much trouble with him. Does it ever hurt when he touches you? Are you nervous when you become intimate? Does he usually skip over the outside entirely? There is clearly something he is physically doing or you are psychologically feeling that is preventing this. Let us know any further details!
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