A
female
age
30-35,
*ublub
writes:Hi, I'm a girl, 18 years old, I have a best friend and he is a gay.. we are so close to each other as if we treated each other as more than friends and as time goes by I felt something strange, maybe I'm already falling in love with him, he always treats me special and I am only his friend that can kiss him on her lips, I'm really crazy about thess things, am I really in love with him? Does he feel the same way too? Sometimes I can say that I'm over assuming with his actions but I can't help it. It really comes to my mind that maybe this GAY friend of mine also has a feeling to me.. and when he has a new GUY friend or new girl friend... I always get jealous.. help me please.. what should I do?? :( another thing is my problem. what would be my gender if I am starting to fall for a GAY.. help me please... :(
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female
reader, hijacked_dignity  +, writes (30 October 2009):
 This happens all the time. It's understandable that you feel jealous when this guy meets other people and becomes close to them. You know why? Because you have a crush on your gay friend. This isn't very surprising either, because for some reason or another, quite a few gay men think that just because they are gay means that they can be physical with their girlfriends and it doesn't mean anything. Gay or straight, man or woman, when you kiss each other and do more than just typical 'friend' stuff, more than friendly 'feelings' begin to surface with one or both parties. When men and women are truly homosexual, I don't think they go around kissing members of the opposite gender on the lips. Just like as a straight woman, I don't make it a point to kiss female friends on the lips. It's just not necessary. So anyway. He might like you. I've had a few gay friends, and those who attempted to be physical with me as a type of joke or whatever I eventually found out were totally willing to do whatever I wanted to do. There are a few gay men who do not hint anything physical toward me and would never think of doing so. You know why? Because they are actually homosexual. Kissing girls whether for show or for fun doesn't interest them. So I think your friend might just be playing the field under the 'gay' label. Getting close to girls is really easy doing that, and hey, they can actually get with guys too. So what should you do? I would just shrug it off. He's obviously got attention from a lot of people, and I think you are just attracted to him. This entire kissing thing is something that is playing with your head, and if this guy is actually gay, then he won't want anything to do with you sexually. Though the way he is acting, he might be up for anything. Either way, if you tell him how you feel, the friendship will never be the same again, whether he rejects you or not. Just something to consider. And as for what gender you are? Uh...you're biologically a female, right? So it doesn't matter who you like, you're still a woman. And you're still straight. Good luck.
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