A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hi everyone. Some insight will be appreciated. I am 32 years old and single. I used to enjoy being single but not anymore (mainly because it is lasting so long) but I am also not desparate for a relationship. Here is the problem. I get a lot of attention from men. I always have done. I have been blessed in the looks department and while that is certainly not a reason to complain at all, it kind of attracts a lot of attention and it is not always flattering. So far, I get the aggressive ones who can't look past the looks and are only interested in sex or they might create a fight in a bar when they get drunk(it happens more often than it should and it is ridiculous. they are quite easy to weed out though) but also plenty of people who would definitely be worth a second look and yet I do not like any of them. There is nothing wrong with these people. They are kind and educated but I am not attracted to anyone at all and it starts to worry me. It is not as if I am looking for perfection either. Looks will fade in time, but attraction goes beyond that. I am just looking for chemistry and I think that is a combination of physical attraction and character compatibility. Of course in the rare event I do like someone they are either taken or moving to another country lol. Sometimes I feel I am being ungrateful seeing that a lot of people aren't getting approached at all and that I should compromise and take a chance with someone hoping chemistry will follow (though I have done that in the past and it was disastrous) other times I think I deserve to live a decent love story that should start with boy meets girl, they find each other attractive, they have compatible personalities and decide to get to know each other better....and it just isn't happening. And the years go by and I am still alone. Instead of being flattered I feel under siege. Contrary to popular belief, rejecting people is not fun. I know how stupid it sounds, believe me.(Please don't mistake this for arrogance. I don't want it to come off like that). I don't want any of this. I just want one that wll be compatible and uncomlicated but I am starting to lose hope. What am I doing wrong? I am not dressing to provoke, I am not flirty and I do not encourage this. Any advise for me?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (14 March 2012):
Let's zero in on what I think is an important detail in your submittal....
You write: "...are only interested in sex or they might create a fight in a bar when they get drunk.."
IF you are in bars looking for a reasonable man-friend with whom you might like to spend you life.... may I recommend that you find some place - any place - other than bars????? Perhaps you might go and spend some time in your local library???? (The guys you meet there are likely to be able to READ!!!!!)...
Good luck....
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