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I found out my wife was gangbanged by 4 guys and it turns me on

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Question - (16 August 2010) 6 Answers - (Newest, 16 August 2010)
A male United States age 41-50, *leazy wife writes:

I found out my wife was gangbanged by 4 guys.

This was before we met. I am very turned on by this and would love to hear full details. My wife however, says she was drunk and ashamed Afterwards and won't open up about it. She did admit to having multiple orgasams so I know she enjoyed it. How do I get her tell me full details? More importantly, how do I get her to do a repeat performance while I watch.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (16 August 2010):

Honeypie agony auntShe is ashamed. DON'T YOU GET IT? She didn't WANT to do it, but due to her drunkenness she did. Most likely she was one of those girls who would do just about anything to feel loved, including being gang-banged.

Multiple orgasms or not... She regrets is more then you know. I'm betting had she been sober she would NOT have done it, had she had a little more self respect.

And YOU want to put her through that again?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010):

When we actually get replies posted, that seem fairly ok with the fact of a kind of 'social gang bang' as though it's normal pastime for young women women, inebriated or not, to take part in, then this is disturbing.

Quote: " It made up my mind on one thing - I'd never invite another girl to join me again unless she gave her consent while perfectly sober. (Well that, and the fact that I don't like sharing)." So this young woman has on more than ONE occasion taken part in this act so it seems, the only positive from this, she doesn't like to share, so another female won't be encouraged to allow herself to be treated as a commodity.

I worry about replies this, free speech, absolutely, but I'm sure most women would be horrified at any aspect of this act. Additionally young girls under 16 who may not have the guidance they need at home, may read this, and this is not appropriate for young people. May be Dear Cupid should consider an adult posting section.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010):

First off no, her multiple orgasms do not equate to her enjoyment.

That you demonstrate zero compassion for your wife's role in the matter, or her feelings, makes you sound not deserving of her.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010):

There is something I have learned reading Dearcupid. You get attacked for thinking anything about a woman's past. If you like it, hate it, just don't want her to lie to you, whatever. From the moment you open your mouth you are wrong.

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A female reader, Gabrielle Stoker United States +, writes (16 August 2010):

Gabrielle Stoker agony auntWomen fall into three categories when it comes to gangbangs. The first (and vast majority) are those who would never even contemplate the act and find it fills them with disgust. The second (a tiny minority) find them thoroughly enjoyable. The third category is of those who are sort of curious about it but would never act upon their curiousity. Unfortunately, alcohol tends to cloud the senses and make people act on their curiousity in a way that they would not, in their right senses. If they do end up doing it, they are subsequently devastated by guilt, no matter how much they enjoyed the actual act. I sometimes wonder what category I'd have fallen into if I'd also been under the influence of alcohol the first time I did it.

Trust me, I've seen girls who were sozzled, appeared to be having the time of their lives during the gangbang and wept like babies the morning after, wracked by guilt to such an extent that it almost became like a physical pain. It made up my mind on one thing - I'd never invite another girl to join me again unless she gave her consent while perfectly sober. (Well that, and the fact that I don't like sharing).

Your wife appears to fall in the third category I've outlined above. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT force her to do this again or even ask her about it. If she feels open to discussing it, she'll tell you on her own. Until such time, you would only be hurting someone you (presumably) love.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010):

Fantasy is one thing.......but your wishing to actually bring this into the real world is not only extremely concerning for YOUR WIFE, as it seems you want to use her like some commodity in a very degrading and abusive sexual act, just for YOUR OWN PLEASURE, but more so, you show absolutely NO sensitivity, care or love towards your wife, OR HOW she may feel about this.

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