A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been on a couple of dates with this guy and yesterday i had dinner at his house and i found womens body sparys and make up in his bathroom. The body spray was left on the side and when i opened the draw to find hand soap there was foundation and eye liner. He is a single guy and we have only had a couple of dates so i get he might have been dating other people but im not sure what to make of this. I'm now thinking he might be seeing someone and possibly a little more serious with someone for them to be leaving products at his house. He told me he has been single for a year but he is a good looking guy so i assume he would have been seeing people inbetween then. Should i bring this up to him? and ask him if he is seeing anyone? Its really put me off him now as honesty and trust is a big thing for meNot sure how i should approach this? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Been there Now over it  +, writes (6 December 2015):
Maybe he's a cross dresser.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2015): If he's had some casual fling coming round I highly doubt she would leave eye liner and makeup hanging round so I think you can cross some fling off your list.
You've had a couple of dates and it is way too soon to be starting an argument over this. It will make him run a mile like others have said.
I split up with my ex boyfriend nearly five years ago but I think I have some unopened razor blades somewhere in the drawer. I know I sometimes find his odd socks in the bottom of my sock drawer. When ive been clearing out things in the house I often come across things that were his.
Even if these things were from a girl he was recently dating before you it wouldn't make him a bad person. If these things are from somebody you think he is in a relationship with I very much doubt he would be inviting you around to his home if she could just turn up.
Try not to bring this up with him because you would come across as quite insecure.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (4 December 2015):
 Oh, so some girl left it there, doesn't necessarily means he's involved with anyone right now. In my experience guys NEVER clean out old toiletries left there years ago. It could be his sister, his mom, his ex, a friend who stayed the night, a hook-up from last fall, you name it.
Or sure, it could be his secret girlfriend, but one of the above is far more likely.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (4 December 2015):
 I agree with WCA
It's a LITTLE (actually a lot) too soon to demand to know who's stuff it is. If I were you I'd just wait with the sex till you two have gotten to a point where talking exclusivity is on point.
And he didn't have a hand soap out? You HAD to dig through his stuff?
My guess is it's the ex's stuff - a casual sex-partner would not leave make up at some guys house.
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (4 December 2015):
After a couple of dates?????
No. That's really getting too personal too soon.
I'd wait and see if it seems this might actually develop into something. You're going to run him right off if you start acting all insecure when you barely know him.
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A
male
reader, wiseoldman +, writes (4 December 2015):
"Its really put me off him now as honesty and trust is a big thing for me"... but you just 'happened' to open a drawer to find some hand soap? While you were at it did you find anything interesting in his medicine cabinet?
OK- you've got competition. Would you prefer to be dating someone who can't attract anyone else? Take a long look at yourself and see if you have the confidence to fight for what you want. The rest is up to you.
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