A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Recently me and my girlfriend have been arguing alot, we've been together for a few years and have always gotten along just fine. I've always trusted her 100%, and we shared everything; Myspace, cell phone, car, email, everything. We had access to each other's old E-mail which we no longer used, but I looked at hers the other day, and I found an email in there to a friend of hers which she used to have a crush on. The e-mail basically said she was thinking about running away, and moving in with me. She tells me she gave her e-mail to someone else, and that's not her. I believe I have every right to be suspicious. What do you guys think? Do you think she's cheating? or would you suspect it?
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female
reader, brooke5426  +, writes (25 September 2007):
 right well that one little word being changed makes all the difference. scrap my last advice, she's up to something. why would anyone want an email address that someone else had when its so easy to make your own? and if someone DID have it now, why wouldnt they change the password? i dont think you should believe that she gave it to someone else and i think you should sit down and talk to her. ask her to be honest, tell her if she's not happy and things are not working for her then is there anything you can do to make it right? you need communication and to talk to each other. she was out of order to go behind your back and start talking about things with another man and only you can decide if you can forgive her for that. if it was me, and i'd found out my man had been telling another girl he was thinking about leaving me for her he wouldnt have to think about it for long cos i'd make the decision for him!
brooke
xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm sorry, I meant she wants to run away with HIM not me. typo.
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A
female
reader, brooke5426 +, writes (25 September 2007):
hang on, i dont think i got it. she told someone shes thinking of running away and moving in with you? how did you get that she might be cheating from that?
or is it because she emailed someone she used to fancy that you think shes cheating?
i dont think she has given the email address to anyone else to use - unless someone other random person is planning to run away and move in with you! lol.
and i dont think she's cheating either, just because she used to have a crush on someone doesnt mean she still has a crush on him. they are just phases that pass. i used to have a crush on jason donovan for gods sake! lol. i could see why you would be worried if she was emailing another guy telling him you have been arguing a lot lately and that she likes him but theres nothing to worry about from what you have said.
i think you're just scared your losing her because of all the arguements so its making you think the worst. try to focus on your own relationship and changing the things you are arguing about because if you are already having problems and you bring jealousy and paranoia into it and start accusing her of something shes probably not doing, you will be doing even more damage to the relationship
good luck
brooke
xx
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A
female
reader, Cokey +, writes (25 September 2007):
hang on.. if she was going to run away and move in with you it may be a problem about something other than infidelity.. I'm confused if she wants to (as you quote) 'move in with me' what's the problem?
people may have crushes on people but never want to go any further than that.. Some crushes tend to be short lived, and find them to be friends above all else, so therefore may tell that person more of their problems and stuff.
Firstly was your name mentioned - with the whole moving in business? Address her without getting angry, otherwise you won't get a response, and simply ask what's going on. Watch her reactions when you ask everything!
It's hard to answer this thoroughly without seeing the email to begin, but your best bet is to confront her and sort it out. If the response is still the same then do something about the email account..
This may not be of great help but good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2007): Running away with who? You or the other boy.
If she used to have a crush on him I don't see the problem - has she ever made you think she's cheating or wants to? Go with your gut because I think your gut is telling you she's being truthful. But why wouldn't they change the password if she gave it to someone else?
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