A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:For those of you who want to read my original question here's the link. I recommend you read it to understand what this question is about.http://www.dearcupid.org/question/after-4-years-i-finally-met-my-ld.htmlI posted that a week ago now. I'm not going to explain everything over again so just go to my original.I feel so miserable =[ in my first question I explained how I felt different and awkward after meeting my LDR for the first time. Well the feeling hasn't gone away, in fact it's gotten worse. Not because my feelings have gotten worse but because I observed this awkwardness in her too and she has even come to admit a part of it after bringing it up last Monday. Despite feeling a bit awkward and didn't know why, things seemed ok between us but as time went by I noticed she's been drifting a bit further and further away to the point that now she hardly says I love you unless I ask her if she does.One thing to keep in mind is that she said she was irritated with me few days ago. This was because she felt that I wasn't doing enough with my time. Honestly I hope to God that's the case and not what I think it is, unfortunately I feel like she said this hoping to believe that, that's what's bothering her.I don't know what's going to happen but I know I don't want to lose her. If we have to take things a little slower that's fine but I don't want things to end, specially not this way. I don't think she wants things to end either but I feel like she's confused and is overwhelmed by this awkwardness herself and I feel as if though something's going to happen or she's going to bring this up sometime soon but I think she doesn't know how to approach me about it.For those of you who have helped me here on my other questions regarding this I really appreciate the advice. I was confirmed by others that this is a normal situation that happens in all LDR's, and that it's best to see her again soon. I just don't know how soon or what approach to take regarding it. I can go on for a long time about it but don't want to bore you guys. I just need the reassurance from others who have been in this situation so I can know it's just a phase that goes away. I think lingering on it by worrying is probably keeping this awkward feeling.She also mentioned my weight, not that I'm fat but I did gain some weight over the past year and a half and I guess it's noticeable but she said it doesn't bother her, just that she wants me to be healthy. To read more on my situation here's another post I made. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/me-and-my-ldr-feel-like-were-drifting.htmlI appreciate any advice anyone has to give me.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2011): This is the poster again. To answer you nime it is a fear I have but honestly I don't know what could be wrong. I do know she said that she didn't recognize me right away cause she hasn't seen as many pictures of me. Well she does have pictures of me and we talked on webcam before. The reason I haven't lately is cause I gained a bit of weight. I'm not fat but I know I need to work on it. She said she still loves me the same and it doesn't change a thing and it doesn't bother her just that she thinks I need to take better care of myself but she did mention it was noticeable. I don't know what to think but I wish shed talk to me like she used to before meeting each other cause I'm still the same guy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2011): Yeah man its all about maturity to be honest. You two are still putting the spirit with the body, as in, coming to terms that both exist and arent just internet or voice spirits. With time, she'll get over that and if she doesnt, then its a sign she's probably not mature enough to handle the relationship and the complications that can some with an LDR. Same goes to you bud. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Nime +, writes (20 March 2011):
 If there's one thing I've noticed in people when they're discussing what's on their mind, it's usually that the very LAST thing they say as an afterthought is what's truly bugging them. Your whole post is following one train of thought about why your girl could be growing distant, that it's the nature of LDRs, and then at the very end you throw in as an afterthought that she mentioned you've gained weight. I could be wrong, but I would bet your real fear is that your girlfriend is not physically attracted to you because of your weight. Do you think this could be the case?
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