A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of almost 2 years dumped me a week before my 18th birthday. We mainly broke up because i flip over the littlest things and treat him really badly.We spoke over the phone before my birthday and he said he would come. I needed to speak to him because i couldnt sleep with the guilt i felt for the things i have said and done to him in the past.He texted me the next morning saying he wouldnt be comeing, it was to soon and he needed space. Eventually we met that night and got back together and he came to my birthday. Luckily were back together because i lost my very special pet rat that day on my birthday and was really upset. He was also going to come to my weekend birthday treat on saturday (got a limo for the evening) but couldnt because he was going on holiday with his mate and things were changed. Sorry to go on, irll try and get to the point. He is away for a week and althogh i do miss him, but im not really botherd. Usually when couples are in love they miss eachother. And i feel maybe i would like a new relationship with someone else. But i am secure with my boyfriend because i know i wont be forced into anything with him. He respects me. Im just so confused about my relationship. My question : im so confused about my relationship, i dont know what i want. How do i figure it out. And if i dump him i know i will want him back again. Sorry its long.
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male
reader, Royofthe Rovers +, writes (8 May 2007):
 The way you described things right at the end of your post, it almost sounded like you are in a comfort zone with him. In the knowledge that you know where you stand with him and vice versa. You need to if you are using this comfort zone for the right reasons.
You almost go back on yourself when you say if you dump him you know you will want him back, but why would you want him back? Is it more as a friend, someone you have come to rely on OR someone you love and cherish?
The question you need to ask yourself is "do you love him"?
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