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male
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anonymous
writes: I met this girl a few months ago at her 21st birthday and fell for her. I can't explain it, as I only met her that day, never seen her before. Then last weekend I went out to where she lives (I'm boarding at her cousin's house) with people I board with on their family holiday, on excuse I needed car parts from out there. I have fallen for her even more. We are friends and dare I say maybe even really good friends, but she has had some bad guy experiences. I know from her cousins and that she doesn't like a guy coming onto her too quick. If she has no feelings that she won't give it a chance, but will stop the friendship or it will ruin maybe a later chance. I would really like to ask her out but not unless she feels same way, as I don't want to be rejected or lose the friendship we have. How can I ask her stuff and try make her think of me in a boyfriend sense? And how can I tell if she likes me back? We live a few hours apart so we'd only be chatting on net mainly, and occasional phone, but if we were dating the distance is no problem, as I would drive out there as often as possible.from desperate and clueless
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2005): she might be thinking the same scared to say anything incase you take it badly and she loses you as a friend..just start small and slow..try spending time with her and getting to know her better taking time to understand her..is things are meant to be they will be.
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reader, pops +, writes (14 October 2005):
If you are planning another visit to her neck of the woods, call her and ask if she would like to go out with you, to, say a movie, or for a drink, or whatever? A walk? That is an easy way to tell a girl you are interested in being more than just a family friend. Don't ask her out to dinner, and a concert, etc. A heavy date the first time is almost always wrong. Besides, if you occupy the evening with lots of activity, you leave no time to talk and get to know each other. Then, be a good ear. Listen to her. Most men babble on for hours about themselves, and never give a woman a chance to say much of anything. Learn to listen. Then see how it goes.
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