A
female
age
41-50,
*ibob
writes:Hello,I am in a situation that I don't know what to do. I will consider your advice very carefully. Due to bad investments, I happened to lose a lot of money. I have always been close to a friend and I shared it with him without any bad intention in my mind. Since he has feelings for me, I decided to give it a try. I never asked him to give me money. He told me that he would sell a house which belonged to him and he said that he would give me money so that I could recover the amount I've lost. But he said that he was not doing this to buy my love. Many times I refused but he insisted. We are still early in our relationship but he already wants to marry me as soon as possible. He's making so many plans of living with me. But I'm not ready for the time being. I always told him that my priority was to settle my debt first and then concentrate on other things. I feel that he's an insecure person who wants to possess me as soon as possible and he is not ready to give me time. All he wants is to live with me the soonest possible because he feels that when he gives me money I'll leave him. I've not taken any money from him.
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female
reader, tibob +, writes (5 June 2013):
tibob is verified as being by the original poster of the question thank you for your answers which really helped me. It's no use pursuing this relationship as he's too afraid that i don't become his wife. My problem is not his concern. All he wants is to make sure he gets me. Yea, i will find help somewhere else. I don't need to 'sell' myself to live a life with an unwanted person
A
female
reader, Ms.B2U  +, writes (5 June 2013):
Listen to your GUT. Anyone that is not LISTENING to what you tell him is about himself & not you. Living together, marriage, things of the sort are what people talk about together & make plans TOGETHER not alone in one persons mind & then reported to the other person. As far as what anyone SAYS about something-who knows with words. BEHAVIOR & ACTIONS always indicate what someone is about way more so than their words. People lie. When actions & behavior don't match the words they say? WATCH OUT !!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2013): money is money, friends are friends but marriage is marriage. and this situation looks like a big future trouble. talk to him. if hes able to help you without the marriage thing. good. take it. but if he said he will help you only if you get marriage to him. FORGOT about it and find help somewhere else. be careful.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (4 June 2013):
 Leaving the debt thing to one side for now.
Do you want to be married to this man? Yes or no?
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