A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi i need help with a friendship. I need to improve it. Quickly. I know it wont happen at the click of a finger and maybe i am hoping its gonna happen quicker than it will but either way i would do anything to get it there. Me and this guy are good friends, well hes said we are but truth is we;re far from it. We are friends and i do think deep down that we care for each other as friends but its the things that you do openly with friends that doesnt happen with us two and its getting me seriously down.To put it bluntly, we could be the best of friends, do stuff together and everything but i feel he doesnt want to. I feel the friendship is one sided and i have spoken to him about this, he didnt have that much to say about it but we both said we wanted to be great friends. So i need to work this out. I'm not worrying over nothing as everyone has seen a difference in me and him. Its just the little usual things friends do day to day that we dont. I'll list afew things that get to me:-When we go out he will just do random stuff with the others and chat and have a laugh. He wont with me. E.g If my mate pointed something out to him of what she was doing he would go and join in. With me he barely acts bothered.-I just get an answer if i text him theres no effort to make a convo.-He will text the others asking if they're out if he wants to go out.-Althought he asks us all if we're ok and what we have been up to thats as far as his face to face convo goes with me.-HE sticks to the others when we're out, when in actual fact i'm the one thats always invited him. He will always go and sit with them even if there isnt much room but he wont sit with me.A part of me feels like he doesnt find me as fun, but i never get the chance i'm pretty quiet and so is he,. except he seems to change depending on who hes around like he opens up more around out mates. Tbh he does just go along with what they are saying sometimes to fit in but then why can't he do that with me? I guess thats a guy thing, changing.People have noticed we barely speak and its not right. Any person would say he clearly doesnt want to be friends and hes not that bothered and tbh i think they're right. he isnt bothered but hes so different with me and its that different its weird. I dont understand why. What can i do to try and snap us out of this before it gets to the point where it stays like this forever?
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male
reader, CombatJack52  +, writes (21 October 2010):
Im going to say this just based on what i read but here it goes. I think he just used/using you to be with the other people you hangout with maybe you should stop inviting him and see what happens and asking your other friends what they think of him hangout with you and your friends
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