A
female
age
41-50,
*linkyplonkyblue
writes:I'm 33 and I've started seeing a guy who I really like. We've only seen each other a few times but have known each other for almost 6 months. We click. The feelings I have for him I've never had for anybody else before, and I'm quite shocked that I could feel like this out of the blue. I thought I knew myself well and knew the feelings that go with relationships. I dont know if I'm going mad or what, but I feel like "we belong together" and like "he is MINE". I sound like a stalker! So I'm wondering, is this the real deal or am I going crazy? I never imagined I could feel like this about somebody. Am I deluded? I wasnt looking for anybody "special" it has just happened. I feel like he's the one. But things like that dont happen in real life, do they?I've not told him how I feel as we have only just started seeing each other. Should I tell him or should I hold out? Is it usual to feel like this? It's escaped me in the past and it's quite amazing.Thank you Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Plinkyplonkyblue +, writes (2 May 2007):
Plinkyplonkyblue is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much everybody. I'm not a lunatic then! I've just never experienced feelings like this. I'll play it cool with him and keep my fingers crossed..
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2007): Hi ya chick, just a quick note to say I know exactly how your feel im going through the same thing at the moment, I have known this guy two weeks and we instantly clicked and I feel as though I have met "THE ONE" luckily when I accidentally opened my mouth and told him how I felt he told me he felt the same. Good Luk hun
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A
female
reader, Plinkyplonkyblue +, writes (2 May 2007):
Plinkyplonkyblue is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi, thanks for your responses. I should have pointed out that although we've known each other for 6 months we've only just started seeing each other in the last few weeks. We are very attracted to each other and it does feel like there is "more" going on than in past relationships I have been in.
I shall take your advice though, and not say anything. I do feel like there is a long way to go with him still, like we've only just started on a "journey". I'll take it slow and see how it works out.
Thank you
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2007): It is very intense and exciting when you finally find someone that you connect with. He could very well be the one. If you don't want to come off like a stalker, you need to ocntinue to let him make the first moves. Don't make the mistake of slipping into the girlfriend role, where you call him daily and ask him questions, don't act as if you are his girl.
Just allow him to pursue you. Don't be the one to bring up the talk, the relationship talk, as most men feel very vulnerable and can freak out if you don't wait for him to ask you for that exclusive commitment.
That said, if you are feeling this connection, chances are he is too, so just back off and let him set the pace. If he does not call though, give him some of the same, don't return his calls right away and continue with your life and other friendships as you did before meeting him, still maintain your independence, self reliance, and all those qualities that hooked hin in the first place.
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A
female
reader, NJmomabear  +, writes (2 May 2007):
 I agree, do not tell him. Rather you should be observing and asking yourself does it feel like its mutaul, your feelings for him? If you have to guess, the answer is no. If there is a moment of hesitation after asking yourself that question, then the answer is no.
If the answer is yes, then it very well may be that the reason you feel this way is because nobody has treated you this special before. Still hold out on saying it verbally but reinforce it affectionately. When he is comfortable, he'll say it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2007): No, you should NOT tell him. You say you've known him six months but only gone out a few times. How come? Could it be he doesn't share your feelings if he hasn't asked you out before now? Unless, of course, he's been out of town on business alot, or otherwise preoccupied.
Be careful that you don't scare him off with this amount of intensity - you should cool your own expectations because (a)its way too soon to be entertaining such ideas and (b) even if you don't actually tell him, he might still sense it.
You're not crazy; more likely just in touch with a lot of pent-up hopes & dreams. Remember, on closer aquaintance you might very well see him in a different light. For now, just enjoy & don't pressure him!
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