A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:my boyfriend and I have been going out for about a year now, and the problem is, whenever we have sexual intercourse, (we use condoms) I tend to dry up so easily. I really love him and want him very much, although I will admit we do not do any foreplay or oral before. We just go straight to sex, should I focus on more play other than straight to the point? Please help, I feel as if my sexual life is going down the drain.
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condom, foreplay, sex life Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (18 September 2009):
It's not condoms that are the problem, it's the fact your boyfriend is rubbish in bed.
Foreplay is there for a reason.
It gets you turned on and wet, and it also stretches you out so you don't feel as much discomfort during sex.
No discomfort means you won't dry up.
Also, foreplay is HUGELY important with the emotional aspect of sex. He may just see it as wham bam thank you mam, based totally on lust, but you actually love him, so that's a big part of getting you turned on.
Having that emotional intimacy of kissing and feeling and stroking and all the other stuff before he even goes near your pants is what makes loving sex so good.
Tell him to get his act together and keep the condoms.
Good Luck!! xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2009): Test yourselves for any STD's and then start taking birth control pills. I had the same problem with an ex of mine, couldn't use condoms because the friction would hurt me. Has was rather thick as well, so the penis size can be a factor here.
Also, focus more on foreplay, take is SLOW to begin with when he penetrates, and then go faster after that?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2009): Foreplay would help a lot. So would some lube - just make sure you get a lube that doesn't damage your condoms. Other than that, if you completely trust each other not to be with anyone else while you're together, then you can both get STD tests, you go on the pill and then you can try it without the condoms...
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