A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am looking for some dating advice. I met a girl online. We have had 2 good dates and the weekend was the third. We had a great night out and we ended up at her place. She said I could stay but no funny business, so I probably took that to the extreme. I think she kind of expected me to make a move but I really didn't. There was hugging and holding of hands but that was all. I wanted to respect her wishes especially as it was the first time I had been in her house and she is a single mum. I think that makes me feel there is more at stake as well. Now I feel like she was expecting me to make a move and was surprised I didn't?? She said as much online the next day. When I left we had a kiss, but not a passionate one which I think was my fault as she initiated it. It should be obvious to me she likes me, she has initiated all the hand holding and hugging and kisses etc., but I choked and I'm not sure why I am being so awkward around her other than because I am nervous and I think it's really confusing her. I am 31 for god sake. The only thing I can think of is it's been years since I have been in the dating scene at this stage, so I am very rusty with signals and I miss the moment. I have thought about mentioning that, but I am not sure if I should. Any suggestions? After talking online last night she seems to think I am trying too hard not to mess up. I don't really want her to think that, so I am thinking I just need to call her up and invite her out this weekend, take control of the situation, see what happens, and make my move. Thanks Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, GeeGee255  +, writes (7 March 2011):
 Calm down you haven't done anything wrong, in fact I think you are going everything right. Showing a girl respect is never a bad thing. Your plan is a good one. So go for it.
A
male
reader, sebaslookingforward  +, writes (7 March 2011):
Im sure she meant no sex. As you said, she expected some kissing. You didnt mess up too much, just be more passionate in ur next day and things will be okay. Good luck man!!
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A
female
reader, SweetSmoochy +, writes (7 March 2011):
 Tell her that you are rusty with signals! Tell her that you haven't dated in a while! How do you feel about her? if you like her, tell her that too! Then she'll be more understanding. Explain that you heard her say, loud and clear, no funny business, so, you initiated no funny business. Women are tricky. We want you to know what we are thinking and what we truly want, regardless of what we say. It's strange, but it's a fact of life. Generally, we do try to be understanding when you don't get our enigmatic hints. If you would like the relationship to progress, Talk to her and let her know what's going on. Communication is key. Next time, YOU initiate the kiss, and throw a little passion into it. She'll love it, trust. Then, if "funny business" occurs, don't be so locked up and allow it to occur. It seems like she would like to head that way with you.
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