A
male
age
30-35,
*omance_boy18
writes:hey guys its been awhile. my girlfriend just recently dumped me just cuz i told her there was a few things that made me uncomfortable.like when i was teasing with her she uses a knife on me as a joke, personally i think she went too far, but she accused me it wasnt a threat when it seemed like plus she said that she forgot she had it in her hand. i feel like im the bad guy when i should be the victim, anyways i just need to know if it was the right thing to tell her.did i make a mistake?
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female
reader, bitterblue  +, writes (19 August 2009):
 Oh my, this reminds me of a case in the news where two lovers used a handbag to hit each other playfully forgetting they had a knife in there - on the way back from a picnic, I suppose. Thankfully you are both safe and sound. This sort of playing can become dangerous, take care.Why don't you two start being more mature? These are not ways to tease the other, by using a knife, or god knows what other sharp things... like words can also be. How about entering a relationship with that type of attitude that will teach the other to admire and respect you? No more games that degenerate into nasty quarrels. Relationships are not supposed to be frowns and clenched jaws either. Be children from time to time, any time it suits you. Fun and laughter can make the two feel closer and break some barriers, communicational and not only, but if you can't handle some light innocent fun without it raking up a great fire, it's not OK at all. You are victims of your own ways to see and act in a relationship. Of course you should speak up if something makes you uncomfortable, but it's also important how you pick your words, and the style, the ideas. At this link you will find some tips of (in)efficient communication and how this leads to healthy relationships (or not):http://www.selfhelpmagazine.com/articles/relation/effectcomm.htmlI don't know what else has been going wrong as you don't detail but you are only young, both of you, so keep learning... your future depends on it. Things will change in time as you gain more knowledge and make proper use of it. All the best.
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