A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am a mother of 2 children. My son is 5 and my daughter I just had almost 4 months ago. I am a little over weight and I have stretch marks everwhere. My boobs sag and I have a nasty stomach. My boyfriend says I'm sexy but I don't believe him. He says that my boobs don't sag (when they do) and that I'm not fat and I don't have a nasty stomach(even though I do). I feel like hes just saying it to make me feel better. I feel like he thinks every other girl out there is sexier than me, even though he says I'm the sexiest. How so I know if hes just handing me a line of bull just to make me feel better? How can I know how he really feels because I really don't feel like he is being honest about how I look? Thanks, Hope.
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female
reader, wiz8mom +, writes (30 November 2008):
You can't really know, you just have to trust. Is he showing his love and affection for you and not just saying it? Believe me, I felt the same way after I had my kids, when I was at my heaviest and most "mommiest." And my husband said the same thing - that to him, I was the sexiest woman in the world. Eww. How could that be, when my stomach and butt looked like a seriously bad case of zebra-itis, and my bust looked deformed because I had stuffed maxi pads in them to stop milk leakage?Sexy isn't just about the package, it's about the attitude. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and think about all the good things you have, your health, your beautiful children. Start working out a little bit and be sure to eat healthy. Adopt the "I'm sexy no matter what" attitude.My kids are a lot older now, I've lost some weight and gotten into better shape. My boobs are still too small, I have tiny wrinkles around my eyes, and my hair is turning grey. But my husband is still here, and he still says I'm the sexiest woman in the world - to him. Fifteen years ago I had to believe him, and trust that it would be this way.One other thing, take a look at your boyfriend. He may not be Hugh Jackman or whoever else is the hot hunk these days. Maybe he has a little pot belly, or his ears stick out a bit, it doesn't matter. In your heart, is he the sexiest?
A
female
reader, babomi  +, writes (3 November 2008):
 u re screwing urself up on self esteen issues
ok, ur body is not perfect, but he does not care, the affection and love and attraction he has for you is more than that, you re the woman he loves, you re for sure the sexiest thing he knows he wants
maybe you don t look like a top model, but the guy there sees you like the best woman ever, that s a choice he made, that came from his heart to you
look at happy couples in the street, they re not only top models and hunks, they re normal people, with defaults who love each other and who accept each other and who desire each other, same for me, same for you
but you still complain that it s not honest or good enough because you stay focused on the stretch marks
i think u re having some issues about your appearance, and it seems to go the physical effects of giving birth, you should go look for appropriate counseling because you re rejecting love and affection
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