A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well ive been with my boyfriend for 2 years now, weve had our fair share of ups and downs.. i love him to bits but theres one thing i really get upset about. Im alone alot, hes at work all the time and i see him almost 2-3 times a week. When i do see him we have sex, but then.. after that day of having sex, he wants me to do things.. allways the same thing ? Oral Pleasure (Blow Job) i feel disgusted doing this, but i dont want him to ever leave me. Ive tried talking to him about this but he just gets angry and very stressy with me. Obviously talking doesnt work with him. He sees nothing wrong with asking me to do it for him, i just think there should be more to our relationship then sexual acts. Can anyone help me please? i really dont know what to do anymore..
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female
reader, d e e p w i t h i n  +, writes (5 October 2009):
 I agree with CaringGuy completely. if he makes you do things you arent comfortable with, he doesnt love you. find someone better. breaking up with this guy will hurt for a while but it is SO worth it in the end when you find someone who loves you equally as much as you love him. don't comprimise with someone like this guy, you deserve better.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2009): Give him an ultimatum, if he doesn't listen and respect what you have to say then dump him.
Tell him ( even if it may be not true), that you don't mind giving him pleasure but you feel like it's all about his pleasure all the time. Ask him to compromise on how much you do it and what you do etc. Maybe ask him to focus on you more. If this doesn't work, then he is a true selfish git who doesn't deserve a second chance. Dumping people is hard especially if you still love them. If you give him a second chance and the results are negative, it should hopefully give you enough courage to dump him, as you would then, hopefully, definately know inside yourself that he only cares for his needs and not yours.
Also, if this does go wrong, please do not judge all other men to be the same as this boy of yours. There are men out there who actually are good at heart.
Hope this helps :) X
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A
male
reader, charlie p +, writes (3 October 2009):
Im sorry, but i do have to agree with the previous poster. im dont want to hurt your feelings sweetheart, but i do think that an honest answer to an honest question is only fair. a lot of women dont feel that performing any particular act is a problem, but ignore them. its your life and your happiness, so do what you feel is right. but heres a suggestion... ask yourself seriously how much of a problem it is, and if its serious enough try the talking again. he wont listen and hell get stressy, but tell him its a deal breaker and threaten to walk. this will solve the problem, either by making him listen to you and remedy his stubborness, or by you and him parting company. but one important point is you do have to be ready to leave him. if so, youre young and wont have to do the things you dont want to do. i wish i had an easier solution but when people say life is hard they arent lying!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2009): Hi. Im sorry to hear things arent going well with your boy friend. It doesnt sound as if hes very caring towards you or even sees you very much. And when he does see you it sounds as if its mainly for sex. Not everyone likes oral sex and if you dont like it, you shouldnt be doing it. The fact that he gets angry and stressed out with you if you try and tell him you dont like it, is very wrong of him and you shouldnt put up with it. Yes there is more to a relationship than sex. If youre feeling thats all it is with him, then maybe you are right and its time to move on and find a proper partner that really cares for you.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 October 2009):
You've found a really inconsiderate guy here. I know you don't want to split from him, but I think he's using and abusing you. You say you don't like doing waht he wants you to do because you think it's disgusting. Then don't do it. If he tries to force you or gets mad, he's not worth your time because he has no respect for you whatsoever. He doesnt listen to you or respect you feelings. You might love him, but he doesnt love you. He's using you. Ditch this guy and find a better one who will respect you and understand you. Not what you want to hear, but this guy isn't worth another moment of your time. You can do better. Don';t degrade yourself.
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