A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:So I am 3 months pregnant but I am not now with the father because things weren't working out. I did things I shouldn't have done when I was mad.I didn’t Like the person I was when I was with him. But anyway, we aren’t together, and I’m not looking for a relationship, but I started talking to this guy for almost a month, and I told him I was pregnant you know when we first started talking. But 3 weeks later he asks me on a date for this Sunday, I accepted. But I think he might have forgotten I was pregnant. At first I didn’t talk to him like I told him I was pregnant that was all, he would msg me and ask how my baby’s doing etc. But that was in the beginning. Recently he hasn’t asked me about my baby at all, and I am starting to think he forgot. And we've been texting back and forth and I reminded him that I was pregnant.I don’t want him to get into something he doesn’t remember about me, it’s his choice.He seemed fine with it in the beginning, but he forgot I know he did, and he hasn’t texted me back since that txt message. I know he's busy all the time, has 2 jobs busy all the time, but he's off today so I don’t know if he's Ignoring me. I'm not going to lie I was interested in meeting him, and I’m usually not Like that to Men. So I feel as if I set myself up for failure. Are men just not interested in pregnant woman?
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male
reader, Serpico +, writes (23 April 2013):
Ok - tough love time.
As much as the romantic side of us hate to admit it, life, for EVERYONE, is all about choices and selecting the best of those choices available to us. Generally speaking, having children and being pregnant is not going to be a positive for the vast majority of men. Men typically dont want to be taking care of another mans children, and thats just the way it is. So, yes, in most cases its a negative. Now, that doesnt mean all is lost, its only one negative among a bunch of things that make up you as a choice. That said, if you want to attract a desirable man (ie - a man who has a lot of good choices available), you'd better be bringing some other terrific attributes to the table.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (22 April 2013):
 I seriously doubt he forgot you were pregnant... that's a pretty important thing... he just wasn't mentioning it as while it's all you think about now... he may have wanted to try to see you as a woman and not just a pregnant woman.
to be honest I can't see how you would even be worried about dating at this point. I have been pregnant twice and while I was married to the dad at the time, I clearly can remember that there was no way I would have felt myself meeting new folks and being confident... my whole world and being were focused on my baby and taking care of my baby... dating should be the last thing on your mind OP.... are you not still grieving the loss of the relationship with the baby daddy? are you not worried about being a single mom?
I'm not a man but I've been told I think like one and I can't imagine a man wanting to date and be intimate with a woman who was carrying another man's baby when she was in a relationship with that man. First of all the contact with the baby father is far from over... there's paternity, and child support and the potential that you two may try to work it out again....
If I was a man I would not want to date a woman who was pregnant, or had given birth within a year... knowing what I know about pregnancy, hormones etc.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2013): Well, you are awfully young and a guy around your age may find you attractive, but to get involved with someone who is pregnant with someone else's baby is tough for a young guy to deal with. They might be thinking you are looking for a baby daddy, or someone to take care of you, etc.You are pregnant now, and that's your focus. I realize you want companionship, but you have a lot ahead of you and it's not likely going to include dating guys. That's something to consider down the road when you have got this Mom thing down and you can handle that and your life supporting your child and yourself.
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A
female
reader, katiekate +, writes (22 April 2013):
 I highly doubt that he "forgot" about you being pregnant. That's not really something someone forgets. If he's not asking you out or testing you back, I think it's fair to assume that he's just not interested. Why are you worried about dating right now anyway? That should be the last thing on your mind. I find it hard to believe that anyone would be interested in dating a woman who's already pregnant. That's just very weird to me... I say focus on your baby and worry about finding a man later.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2013): I can only speak for myself and I would have no problem in dating a pregnant women. I also threw your story out to my friends in our weekly poker game. All six of my buddies said it wouldn't be no problem. I guess they want to know if they would be considered the dad if the relationship were successful and if you would consider having children from the man you are now dating if it developed into serious
relationship with marriage way up the road. They also would like to know what the relationship of the father of your baby your carrying would have with them in a new relationship? Myself I believe anything is possible. hell, I can change diapers and take the kid on walks. My biggest fear is going to be are you or would you be committed to me only if I decide to date you and consider you being marrying material? You have a baby coming, how are you going to convince me that you are sincere and real? Or do you just want me to give you head while pregnant and rub your back? Explain to me how we can develop a meaning ful long lasting relationship in your present state? Is that what you want? Please be clear and lay it out for any potential suitor to understand. Thanks......
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2013): Listen life now isn't about just you, it's about that baby growing inside of you.. A new boyfriend at the minute would complicate things.. You need to first of.. 1 look after your health and the babies . 2. You need to get the baby daddy to step up and if he's not going to be there emotionally then he can at least be there financially .3. Children need both parents ( even if separated)4. Do you have a home, support, clothes for the baby, furniture ( cot, pram, bedding etc These are the important stuff not another boyfriend.. Get your life and house in order, then look for love. Take care sweetie .
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (21 April 2013):
 Only three months out of the last relationship, and three months pregnant and wondering why some guy isn't interested.
I am sure there are some men out there interested in pregnant woman, but to be honest, most of those men would have been the one who impregnated her in the first place.
You many need to be a bit specific if you are looking for a man, let them know up front what you expect from them, are you looking for a baby daddy, marriage, adoption of the child or just a good time until the diapers and middnight feeds kick in?
If you do find a man interested in a pregnant woman what role are you expecting the pair of you to play in each other's lives? You do realise you need to start considering more than yourself now don't you?
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