A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I feel as though I have come to a halt in my life where I can't move forward heres the story...My dad's disabled - he has problems with his back. He is also epileptic and suffers from severe arthritis and he has been this way all my live so i'm living with that but...I'm 17 years old and haven't really been completely happy since the age of 9 when my mom and dad split up I went to live with my mom for a while and she met somebody else a man who she is still with to this day that I witnessed physically and mentally abuse her on several occassions despite this they are still together and I was kicked out of the house by him for arguing with him over it however I don't blame my mom she's a great person and it's not her fault that she cannot find the strenght within herself to turn her life around. This was followed by my nan and grandad both dying in one weekend, followed by my uncle dying of cancer, a close family friend commiting suicide, and the my aunty dying of cancer, and being made homeless for a while. I started to think things were looking up when - we got a new house to home me, my dad, sister and nephew. We were all alot happier and better off money wise. Then my dad was told he had serious health problems so every week he goes up to the hospital for three days so as if I wasn't worried enough and stressed out enough about this my mom then gets taken into hospital and today we've been told that her blood isn't in its normal state which means that they can't operate but they need to operate and they cant because if they do there's a possibility that she won't make it through so they need to see if her blood will restore itself back to it's natural state.So I've had enough now. There's only so much one person can take and I can't take it anymore.I don't know what to do...???x
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female
reader, Manya  +, writes (22 August 2008):
Dear X, I agree with starfairy's answer, and would like to add that you are very centered in your writing and explain these incredible sadnesses and complicated problems carefully, so that I think that you already think deeply about everything and, I imagine, have discussed this with friends, etc. ? I really think you have already shown yourself to be strong, in handling all this so far!! Therefore, please don't be discouraged and never, ever give up!
Just take some time off from thinking about this more than you have to, and
be think positive thoughts. Your Mom will feel better if she feels you are happier! Do you play chess or sports, or go running? Do anything to cheer yourself up.
You have so much of your life ahead of you!! Please hang in there. Believe me, that things will get better, although that may seem a long way ahead!!
I feel so sorry for you about your mother, and my mother has health issues, too, and I find I have to think about other stuff. Also, if the problem is that she doesn't have some element in her blood, the hospital may be able to give her some and operate very soon. I would say, think positively, and also, pray if that is something you do. They say that prayer can be a healer, sometimes in miracuous ways!!
Also, counselor (possibly through the school if there's someone you like) could give you some support.
I know that myself and all the Agony Aunts are rooting for you!!
Be strong!!!
Love,
Manya
A
female
reader, starfairy +, writes (22 August 2008):
 It's hard not to take on your parents problems too...You have to learn not to worry so much, however hard that might be!
Perhaps counselling might be a good idea, just to simply give you someone to vent to, or take up a physical activity, swimming, boxing, that kind of thing, work out your stresses!
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