A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My bf is my first sex partner and I'm not very experienced. He wants to start cumming on me like they do in the pornos. We always use condoms, so I'm I'm scared I will be grossed out if he takes it off and finishes like that. I've never done that. For the people who do this, is it gross? What does it feel like? In porn it always looks like a lot comes out but with him, it just looks like a little bit in the end of the condom when he's done. Any advice?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2008): At your age, I wouldn't have known what to do in that situation either. Bottom line.....if you don't feel comfortable with that, then don't do it. Sex should be a mutually agreeable act. Respect yourself and don't be afraid to stand your ground.
On the other hand, if this is something you are planning to do anyway, I can tell you that it's not bad at all. My husband sometimes pulls out on my stomach. The fluid is thick and a bit sticky. There isn't a ton of it like you see in some adult films. Maybe two good spurts and little more dibbles out after. What you see in the condom is it. I can easily wipe it off with a hand towel. Don't stress over it. It's not a big deal one way or the other.
A
female
reader, starfairy  +, writes (22 August 2008):
 Maybe give him a hand job, without the condom on, to see how you feel about it, then progress slowly, let him come on your stomach maybe...If you don't feel comfortable, don't do it though.
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A
male
reader, ChiRaven  +, writes (22 August 2008):
 Porn and real life are two totally different things. Don't believe everything you think you see.
The fluid itself is not particularly "gross" ... it's just slightly sticky and slick. If you do this you'd probably want to wash it off relatively quickly because it tends to dry hard. Moist towels like baby wipes or something like that are especially handy for this. If you want to get a "feel" for it before you actually try this, you might want to consider giving him a hand job just to see what it feels like.
And the volume of fluid varies depending on the situation and the guy. Obviously if he's already come once in the evening, he'll have less to give than if it's his first time that night, for example. (And never underestimate the power of trick photography in porn, either!)
But since you're using condoms I assume that you're at least somewhat concerned about the prospect of disease in there somewhere, and you should be aware that the fluid can transmit diseases through other ways than conventional intercourse, so its indiscriminate use all over your body is probably not too good an idea.
In the end, though, you should insist that your boyfriend respect your wishes in this matter. You should take his request into careful consideration, but if after you think it over you decide that you can't do it (or you're not ready to do it yet), tell him, and make him understand that your decision is your own to make. Don't let him pressure you further on the subject. If he cares about you, he won't try. Oh, he'll be disappointed, but in the end if he really cares about you he will recognize that your decisions must be respected. Just as you should realize throughout your relationship that his requests should be given very careful consideration and should be looked at with an open mind, as you are looking at this one.
Good luck, whatever your decision.
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