A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I feel that many people hate me especially girls. I don't know why and when this feeling started. I'm sure if they don't really hate me, they would probably don't like me and don't enjoy my presence. Only my family and my boyfriend that really love and accept me.I remember I'm not like this before. Everybody loves me and always asked me to join their activities. Now many girlfriend lose contact with me and sometimes I think they find me only when they need me. I know its sounds like I'm boosting myself if I told you this, but honestly sometimes I think the girls are just jealous with me because I have made so much progress in my life. I used to be a nerd, shy, and introvert girl before when I'm 15. Now I'm educated, fashionable, have a boyfriend who dear me so much, have a happy, success and rich family ( which cause many cousins jealous with us, not my feeling but the fact we know from other relatives ). Also, I'm more popular than they that time among the boys, thanks to my sense of humor. Btw, I don't smoke, involve free sex, going out until late nite and always loyal to my love one. I've done things that I think good. Maybe I'm too naïve? Or maybe I'm too egoist? There's one girl friend that I feel strongly jealous with my condition and trying to follow my popularity by turning every conversation to vulgar conv to get attention from boys. She used to be my best gf until I know that she make bad rumors about me behind. Maybe she feels insecure because the boy she likes keep giving me attention and like to chat and respect me unlike her. A female cousin of mine also doesn't accept my facebook request. I don't know why but that's happen after last time we met at her wedding party ( not a formal one, just for close relatives because their financial condition ). She wears a casual outfit, t shirt and jeans in her wedding party!Me, as a guess wear a pretty long dress and her mother and sister keep complaining and told her that her outfit is not suitable and keep praising my dress and comparing me with her. I know what she might feel that day, but is it my fault?? I don't even imagine she would dress like that, if I know I would probably wear casual outfit like her too.I'm tired of this situation. I feel so alone, I'm desperate thinking how my life would be so sucks now. I become over sensitive about other opinion and it affect the way I talk and my gestures the way I treat others. Help me please. Thanks in advance :)--------added from the same poster------------Sometimes I feel bad about myself. I feel I'm a bad girl. I jealous easily, so negative thinking, immature, and egoist. I don't like that other woman better than me. I'm really bad about this. I want to change. But how? Its automatically done without my desire to become like that. I'm an introvert girl, don't have any close friend now but many common friend. I get jealous when I see my other friends hang out without including me, so close and have better boyfriend than me. Now I don't have close find that I can hang out with. What can I do to change this behaviour? It turn my life worst, I always feel lonely, insecure, and become a pessimist person. I'm not like that before. I want to have a happier life, life without jealousy and peaceful life.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionT
A
female
reader, Ambrosia26  +, writes (12 July 2012):
I was on here with my own question and read yours. I felt compelled to write. I am so much like you and have been through similar. Please do not be hard on yourself. It sounds like you have high moral integrity and you have fought hard for what you want. I do not think you are an egoist at all, setting high standards for yourself is not the same thing. Working hard and getting on and also these days having morals - yes, does make you unusual and yes, many folk won't understand you but that is another thing. From your post you do not sound like an introvert other people make you feel like you are, so please dispense with that. You sound sassy and confident to me although you may not realise it. Do not change yourself back to what you were, rather seek other new friends maybe through different pursuits that would suit you better. By adapting your behaviour back down to what it was, you are lowering yourself to the level you were before you tried so hard to better yourself and that is sad. Please don't do that when you have tried so hard to rise above what you were, it is something to be extremely proud of and many others could take a leaf out of your book. I had to leave all my old friends behind when I decided to make life changes, basically they didn't undertand me. It was hard to lose old contacts but I now have new ones through my new work and they really do understand me. It is a sad fact of life people are negative and jealous of success and old contacts rarely understand the choices we make. Rise above this, make some new friends, do not associate with folk who make you feel negative. The most important thing, don't reduce yourself to other peoples level. It sounds like this could have given you low self-esteem. Take heart, I've been there and done that and it gets better. Surround yourself only with new, loving, positive people. They are out there truly, just search for them. Above all be yourself, you sound wonderful and one of life's tryers.
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