A
female
age
30-35,
*i_rok_harder
writes:Ok so, I've been going out with this amazing guy for almost 7 months. He is my first real boyfriend. I love him more than anything. But, I just found out a few months ago that he wants to..."explore the south" as in the sexual kind of way if you know what I mean. I honestly dont feel to comfortable with it so when ever he asks, I just say wait. The thing is, I'm afriad that if I keep saying wait, he'll get tired of it and leave. I'm afriad that being sexual with me is all he really wants. I know hes told me a lot to convince me that he really does love me, but, I can't tell. I'm so confused right now and I have NO CLUE what to do. help?! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2008): i've been there before.if he loves you liek he says he does he'll wait as longggggggg as you want him too.if he trys to leave let him go.don't do sumthing you don't want to do.its just means it wasn't meant to be-seven7
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (4 September 2008):
If he won't keep waiting then he is no good as a boyfriend and he is doing you a favour by showing you he's a jerk now, rather than after you give yourself to him.
At your age, you have to make them wait as long as you want because it's your first time at everything so it has to be special.
Make him wait as long as you want. Remember that back in the day people waited till after they were married. Some times they still do. It's not going to kill him to wait.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (4 September 2008):
 Tell him that you care for him, but that you are not ready to be sexually active and that it makes you uncomfortable. If he truly loves you, he'll understand you, and respect your feelings. If you were to give in to the pressure, and have sex with him... it wouldn't guarantee that he wouldn't dump you. Furthermore, even if you had sex and he didn't dump you, you'd always have that nagging question: "is he with me just because I give him sex?" There are loads of nice, decent guys... and some guys are creeps. If he understands your feelings and supports your decision not to have sex... then you'll know that he's one of the good ones. And if he fails you, then set your sights on someone who DOES respect your feelings.
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A
female
reader, SugarCookie +, writes (3 September 2008):
If he is as "amazing" as you say he will wait as long as you want to. Its not worth being with a guy who wants sex. Trust me sex changes a relationship and guys tend to expect it after they get it the first time.Either he'll keep waiting or move on and if he moves on then he is not worth your time.
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