A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So yeah I am aware this has nothing to do with relationships but need some help. Well just found failed second year at uni, now i dont know what to do, all I have been doing is crying which I am aware is silly as cant change it. But am scared that when i repat in september I am not gonna make any friends as they will all know each other from the first year. My boyfriend pasted and I ma pleased for him but hating the thought of being here an extra year without knowing anyone, and this time next year all my friends will be graduating while il still be here. Really dont know what to do Reply to this Question
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (2 June 2012):
 It's good that it hit you hard, if you had taken your insuccess lightly, probably you would have been tempted to slack off this year too and risk another insuccess.
So, instead, you got a wake up call who will spur you to work harder and put more effort and constance in your studies.
Which, should in a way solve the problem of your social life- you are there to study, learn stuff and get good grades, not to make friends or socialize. So, if it happens it happens, ( meeting people, having fun etc. ) if it does not, - you'll use the time to work harder during the week, and you still have weekends to devote to your Bf and old friends.
Anyway, you are making things in your mind worse than they will be.
Having moved around a bit, I have been often in the position of being ,so to speak , the " new kid " , not at school, but at work, in a new group of peers, a new city, etc.
It's not so terrible as you depict it. In fact, the " new kid " always piques some interest and curiosity, a new face always does. So, unless you are pathologically shy or standoffish, don't fret. Give it time, be nice , cordial and approachable to everybody, and you'll surely make new contacts. After all , these people only have been together one school year, it's not like THEIR bond goes back ages . In fact, pardon my bluntness , your concern seems more appropriate for a child at her secong year of elementary school, not of university. Moving around in different circles from those you used to belong to is a normal , ordinary , often inevitable experience in the life of many adults, so might as well practicing.
But, really, it won't be that bad :)
A
male
reader, balthazar  +, writes (2 June 2012):
dear friend,i understand what you are going through right now,you might be feeling guilty for neglecting your studiesor you might be depressed because you have to repeat a yearunderstand this i had to repeat two of my years of studyone was my own fault.The other was due to external circumstances.so i probably know how you feel right now.when things go on the wrong way do not give up instead give your best.Instead of being depressed and gloomy put your heart and soul into your studies and neglect the criticism which you get.use them to fuel yourself and prove others wrong if anyone calls you a failure work hard and top your exams.friends are those who support you.Mind you this is only if they find anything worth supporting.If your previous friends circle doesn't support you I support you to ditch that circle of friends. hope you find this answer satisfactory.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2008): Sorry to have to ask this, but why did you fail? It seems to me that you are a little too focused on your friends and need to develop an identity of your own. I don't want to sound harsh, but I have been there myself.
Your at university and you will only have this opportunity once in your life. Don't worry about the parties and what your friends might say if you do or don't do something. First priority is your education.
What you should be more concerned with is your academic record and what consequences failing this year will have on your goals. The last thing you should be thinking about is how it will effect your social life.
Take some time to refocus and make a plan to do better. Good luck. You can do it!
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