A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: Sorry, this is VERY long. I recently got back with an ex boyfriend, and things are going great. We are both so happy and it's perfect. The thing is today my friends starting making fun of him. Whilst I was with them. At first I knew they were just joking, but it still hurt a little. I'm not the kind of person to say how I feel that often. However I told them to stop several times, but they just carried. I ended up getting so angry I swore at them, insulted them, but they STILL carried on. I nearly ended up slapping one, but I knew the kind of reaction I'd get, so I didn't. My two best friends (who I knew wouldn't have done this) weren't there at lunch so I couldn't defend myself. I stayed with them, but then I got so angry that I started crying. I ate lunch with them, they kept laughing, they didn't apologize, and they didn't seem to feel sorry for me one bit. I talked to one of them and all her repsonses were "It was just a joke", but she had no idea how anrgy I was. I talked to another one (call him "g") and he finally listened to me, after I begged him. The group seemed to be lead by one, lets call her "h", so "h" was leading them although my other friend "l" was away, and she would usually take control when things got out of hand. So I was alone. The other people in the group used to be my good friends, however they were inconsiderate. My two best friends finally came at the end and they listened to me, apologizing that they weren't there. Later one of the group ("k") came up to me and goes "you okay?", I just said "yup" then ignored her. I don't think she should have done that after how she treated me. The main dilemma is, I don't want to lose any of my friends. Despite how they treat me I love them all. What should I do to win back the group that was mean to me? You may think I made a big deal out of this but I was THAT angry I couldn't contain my water works haha. Thankyou so so so so much in advanced!!
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male
reader, Neboraic +, writes (29 April 2009):
ive had bad friends in the past and learnt that there is no way to win them back, those people were never friends in the first place. But i had no where else to go and so put up with it. The name calling didnt bother me much, i got used to it but i did learn that they didnt care about me. The best thing you can do is find another group, one where you have better status. Its better to have fun with the nerds than be abused by the cool kids.
I doubt you came here to be told that. The best thing you can do is leave when they start making fun of you. Also try to develop friendships with them individually, it may not work as a group, especially under the influence of a group leader.
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