A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am in a relationship, which is going really well, I've never felt so valued or loved. He is everything I have ever wanted in a man. We have been seeing each other for 18 months, the thing is that he wants to make it more permanent, and move in together, with a view to getting married, but my son, who is nearly 21 and lives with me is not happy about living with my new man. I understand both sides, but I don't want to have one side happy and risk hurting the other. What do I do? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for your advice. I have been battling with this question myself, and now I feel confident enough to deal with it. Sometimes it helps to have someone from outside the situation tell you what you know to be true!
Thanks again
Dx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2007): Your son is still living with you at the age of 21? He should be thinking about living elsewhere by now. Why should you put your life on hold because of a kid aged 21, for goodness sake. If you want to go then let him know that you are going and that is that. If he doesnt like it then tough. How long are you going to be left living with him for, until he is 40, er maybe 50 and your chances have all gone. Selfish little sod should move on and let mum have a life, sorry to be brutal but i have had it with my kids in the past, and i moved in with my bloke and then got married and we live happy ever after.
take care and dont let kids ruin your life.
xx
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A
male
reader, Richard_EMids +, writes (17 October 2007):
 The initial idea is hard to take for your son - understandably. Don't forget these are probably emotional feelings he has - which are not necessarily rational - or fair. Try to let him become accustomed to the idea gradually. Little by little. Evolution not revolution. Don't try and persuade him - but let him know this is the direction it is heading. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Tommy7  +, writes (17 October 2007):
Unless your son is in school he should be learning to get by on his own. Your son should not be interfering with your relationship with your bf.
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female
reader, flower girl +, writes (17 October 2007):
 I understand about you not wanting to hurt your son, but surely at the age of 21 he is being a little bit selfish.
He is just starting out in life and you have been there for him for 21 years, it's your time for happiness now and i don't think you should throw it away because your son does not like the idea, as he could turn round six months down the line and tell you he has met someone and he is moving out.
I think you need to chat with him and tell him how you feel and just explain to him want you want, he will just have to be grown up about it and accept it.
Take care.xx.
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