| A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: When I was younger and still learning how to socialize, I made many mistakes and the group of friends I had at that time gradually wrote me off as a failure at life. I recouped later in life. It took some time to get over the losses and mistakes I'd made, but eventually I made new friends and had new lovers. Now, I feel like I'm going through a new phase in life where I need to learn another set of rules, or where I really need to remember the old ones I learned, but I'm slipping. I don't know if it has to do with turning 30 recently or if it is part of a series of bad choices, but I feel like if I were to open up to my friends right now about how I feel right now, that I will be written off again as a failure of life. I feel alone and terrified of this happening again. I worked hard on myself to grow enough to start over. Now, I feel like I will lose the people I know now and yet again have to start over. I don't think I'm moving up in the world when I get a new batch of friends. I think how I relate to people changes. I can't blame it on external circumstances. I know I can talk to a counselor about how I'm feeling, but that doesn't resolve the loneliness and lack of close friendship that I'm feeling right now. I don't know what to do and I don't know if I can handle losing those that are close to me, again. Reply to this Question
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