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I don't want to be jealous!

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Question - (10 October 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 10 October 2007)
A male United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

hey guys would like your help please

Me and my gf have been together for 10months now we're both virgins n are planing to have sex for the first time.

my gf told me that she loves i think i feel the same but i have a problem is that she told me about her past n i dont like the fact that shes more experienced them cuz shes my first gf. shes only been with 2guys and had a fling n kissed sum randoms guys when drunk.

Her past bothered me n i keep wanting to ask her questions about it i dont understand why! i know it will make things worse for me bt i cant help it.

everytime i think of her past i get this burning feeling within me.

can someone help me understand why im like this and can someone show me how i can moved forward its gone on for too long now i hate it!! i jus wanna be happy!!! n i dont want to hurt her!.

Thankyou....

View related questions: both virgins, drunk, her past, jealous

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom +, writes (10 October 2007):

kenny agony auntTo be honest you will be hard pushed to meet a girl who has not had past relationships or kissed guys when drunk. If all you are thinking about is her past then these feelings will slowly but surely eat you up and drive you up the wall. Instead of focusing on her past and dwelling on negativity, live for the here and now, think positive things and leave what happened in the past, in the past.

All the best & good luck

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A male reader, Tommy7 United States +, writes (10 October 2007):

Your anger is the normal male emotion, but it is not rational. Your emotion can only hurt you and your relationship. Maturity is being able to control those irrational emotions. Concentrate on the here and now and what you want to accomplish.

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A male reader, rcn United States +, writes (10 October 2007):

rcn agony auntYou have to realize her past is hers. Her being more experienced has nothing to do with how she feels about you. You'll find as you get older people develop pasts. There are some people 10-20 years old than you that have quite colorful pasts.

Do you think because she kissed other guys, that makes her less of a person. Do you feel that wanting to have sex with her, you were kind of wishing you would have had these other experiences for the first time with her as well?

Is it your right to know all the answers from her past? If you were in her shoes and she felt this way and wanted to pry, would you feel violated by those actions?

Don't let her past bother you. You're with her now, they are not. It doesn't matter what she did in the past, what matters is the time you share with her now.

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