A
female
age
22-25,
*razygurl_133
writes:Hi! I'm having a bit of trouble atm. This boy in my class that has a crush on me won't stop FaceTiming and texting me. Should I not reply or tell him I don't feel like talking right now? He always wants to hangout and I always say yes when I actually don't want to. I want to say no sometimes... But I don't want to sound mean... He asked me once if we we're best friends and I said yes and I regret saying that cause I don't really wanna be best friends with him, I just wanna be friends. So he always says "im glad we're best friends" when I don't even want to be best friends with him. Should I tell him that I just wanna be friends? I don't want him thinking I strongly dislike him or that I'm annoyed by him. I hope you're all having a amazing day! Thanks xx
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (24 April 2016):
 You are not doing yourself OR him any favors by being fake or faking it.
If you don't want to hang out, tell him.
If you feel like he is Face-timing and texting too much for your liking, tell him. It's NOT his fault that you find him annoying -it's YOUR fault for not setting boundaries.
And IF you don't REALLY want to be friend with him either TELL him or slowly drop the contact.
HE is NOT a mind reader. And it's NOT being MEAN to tell someone where you stand.
IT IS OK for you to stand up for yourself and SET some limits. And while it might initially "feel" a little mean to tell him "here are my boundaries" I think it's a lot less mean than faking a friendship.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (24 April 2016):
 But you ARE annoyed by him because he’s being a pest and clingy.
“Derek, dude, you’ve facetimed me x times today and texted y times. Dude. Too much. This feels uncomfortable to ask you and uncomfortable to say to you but please just drop the contact to a more ‘friends’ level.”
You’re being mean by pretending to be his friend, in the long run it would be kinder to be clear that you just don’t feel the same way he does. You can do it gently and politely.
“He always wants to hangout and I always say yes when I actually don’t want to.” So you always say yes and he always wants to hang out so you are spending time together a lot then, no?
You are working very hard to protect his feelings yet aren’t being honest with him. Or is it you just don’t want to be considered mean?
How about we try a little experiement? Write a message like he would and we can come up with a response that will help make things easier for you to say your truth to him. Which is that you don’t want to be close to him and he’s become annoying.
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