A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hey guys, some really good advice would be great right now :) I had been seeing a guy for about 5 months, but it was always off and on. One week I would hear from him every day, then I wouldn't see or hear from him for maybe a couple of weeks. We really do get along so well, lots of things in common and I really felt we had a good connection. Then he started to tell me that he couldn't commit and that he never wanted to fall in love again. So I tried to move on but whenever I did he would always get back in touch saying he missed me. So then it would go back to the way it was with him coming in and out of my life. Then one day we were talking and he mentioned this girl from years ago that he really liked but for one reason or another he couldn't be with her. I kind of got the impression that he had feelings for her, possibly even still. It wasn't a jealousy thing, I honestly have such sincere feelings for him that I really would put his happiness over my own, so although it hurt me to do it,I suggested that maybe he should speak to her. Just so that he can sort it out in himself, you know get closure? As much as I want him to have those feelings for me, I kind of thought at this point if he doesn't have them by now he never will. I didn't end it with him I only suggest that he talk to the girl, that was it. When he left everything seemed fine between us, just like always. But he stopped answering my messages straight away. This guy knows how I feel about him although I never told him and I want him to be happy. Thats the only reason I suggested talking to this girl. I thought if nothing else we could still be friends and I don't understand why he wont talk to me now?
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female
reader, lennyboo +, writes (22 August 2009):
You are to good to him. He seems extremely unsettled in his mind and indecisive and I honestly don't think you need that. You deserve someone who will always be there for you, not coming and going and want you to be happy just as much as you want them to be happy. I think he is just going to end up hurting you more and more. Explain this to him and consider moving on.
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