A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I met a guy, one who appears to be the perfect man. After a week of talking on the phone, we met. In my opinion, it was a nice weekend. After he left on Monday, we had a good conversation, but not as great as it was before we met each other. By the end of the week, the calls and texting had stopped, but the last text I received from him went on and on about how he was still interested in me. When I tried to call and text him, there was no reply. I continued this path for the next 4 or 5 days. I don't understand why the sudden loss of interest. He's 47 and I think he's too old to still be playing the game. I like this guy and can't seem to be able to put him out of my mind. What should I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionto all of you who commented on my question. thank you. just want to address some of the additional questions which were asked. no i did not meet this individual on a social web site. i was introduced from a friend of a friend. no i don't normally act so fastly, but the communication was great. i guess he caught me at my most vulnerable moment. i do realize it was a foolish act on my part. i can't change it, i can this only grow from point. i assumed at our ages the games would be over. lesson learned. i took what he said at face value.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank u! I think you are right.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2011): He got what he wanted. You are old enough to know the score. Do you normally get involved this quick? Wasnt from a date site by any chance? Was what you expecting a proposal? You hardly knew him. He may be back when it suits him.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (23 February 2011):
 Sigh... some people never become to old for playing the game, - you may have met one of them.
So far , it sounds like the classic " I don't want a real relationship but ... ( insert " I want you in my life " " I care about you " " etc.etc)" I don't think he lost interest , I think he was and is interested within the narrow limits of his terms and conditions, which you may have misunderstood or overrated at the beginning.
Now it's up to you- if you were looking for a steady , committed relationship, this does not sound like the right person, it all would become an exhausting tug-of-war.
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A
female
reader, OhGetReal +, writes (23 February 2011):
 Never pursue a man more than he pursues you. Otherwise you won't know his true interest or intentions.
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A
female
reader, OhGetReal +, writes (23 February 2011):
So you met him on a dating site on the web? And he lives out of town? And your first meeting was him spending the weekend at your home? Whose idea was that? Did you sleep with him?
He didn't call you or text you after he left and for the next 4 or 5 days you continued to call him (because you had sex with him?) with no reply?
And you don't know why you haven't heard from him and he's too old to be playing these games?
If this was the scenario you can't see what is wrong with this picture?
First off no man is perfect and if he seems too good to be true he probably is. There is a high percentage of disordered or toxic men on line so you have to be extra careful when dating them.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2011): I'd say to ask him, flat out. Explain how you feel about it and ask his side or his opinion. Hopefully he'll be honest and you'll find out if he's really interested or just trying to politely let you go.
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