A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi all... its a bit complicated story.. in summary.. i love this guy so much and i m ready to give up everything for him but he seems he dont love me as much as he loved his ex before...This is a nightmare for me..I cant remove this from my mind... I know he loves me so he keep this LDR with me..right? anyways pls advise me what to do....My Bf..is my best friend's cousin and my friend stopped him to love me...All his family...even his cousin-my best friend don't want me.. but I dont know what is the reason.. I am a professional working here but he is still studying his Masters and he lives so so far away from me... He is 3 years younger than me..he had a very good relationship with a girl and they even stayed together..but he broke up with her coz he said he found true love in me... Before him I had a lot of boyfriends too.. but i never had much physical contact with my ex-s before.. even if i had sex with them..i still can count how many times.. its just 2-3 times only..Anyways.. we tried to fight everybody and we are in love now.. i love him so much.. deeply...and when the starting days.. that was too sweet.. he loved me so much he cared a lot about me.. he even visited to me without letting everyone knows...he came here coz he said he wated to say he love me in person.. I was so happy...He dumped his ex because he loves me..We started to know each other in Aug 2009.. he came to me in Dec 2009 and we fall in love...before he went back, my best friend ( my roommate) moved out.. and when he went back I have nobody with me.. my bestfriend is gone too and she didnt contact me anymore since then... I started to avoid all friends.. now I have no friends in frequent contact.. I am not invited for friends meet up coz my best friend is there and she doesnt want to see me... my family heard all about these and they were so angry coz I am the one they value...Now I am so far away from my pa and ma.. .far away from my bf... no friends... work sucks here and I am not happy anymore... I am staying alone at home and I cried myself to sleep everynight... I think I am getting depression..My bf loved me a lot before...and I was so happy he loved me.. I planned to get rid of my job and follow him there.. I planned to give up my family.. my work.. and my prospects.. but I am still supporting my pa and ma partially... they will feel sad if I do so... But I planned all.. I gave up my everything to get near to him but he seems dont understand me... everyday he find my faults.. and talk about my past.. he is so jealous.. I can go only home-work-groceries shopping everyday.. Its been almost a year.. Last month I visited to him.. and we had a great time.. and we planned to move in to his place and get married...before I visited to him.. i accidentaly checked his facebook.. older posts and I found he posted a lot about how he misses his ex.. It was in last years before he fall in love with me.. He went back to his hometown for 3 months and he left her there and he missed her til death...for me I ve been staying so far away from him but I never had such posts from him til now... may b because i m oline on IM every day n night and he can easily talk to me... but even if I tag some of his photos on fb. he deleted and he locked some of his facebook privacy... I feel like I m used now.. I thought he loved me that much.. but he didnt love me like he loved his ex...he said hewould never dump her if he loves her that much... what am I to believe.. I am too childish or what? Please help me!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (2 October 2010):
 I usually am of an understanding that if someone loves you they will prove it. There's lots of flaws in his interest in you and i think you know the answers yourself. He probably does still love his ex and he wont be able to move on or put 100 percent in to you until he gets over this, if he wants to that is. You seem to be doing more of the running than him. He shouldnt be rubbing your faults in to you, is he perfect? Don't burn all your bridges for him yet, he sounds like he has unfinished business. Is there anyway you can ask his ex if she's still interested in him. Don't lose any more sleep over him, just get to the truth. hope this helps
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