A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm 27 and I've just realised today that I don't have any good friends, only acquaintances. I know I must be unintentionally doing something to cause this, so my question is how do I fix it?I always make an effort to be nice and friendly to people, but my relationships very rarely ever move past the small talk/occasional meeting sort of stage. I've only realised now since a lot of people I classed as friends have drifted away from me and don't really seem keen to reconnect on any significant level (I mean they are happy to meet for a catch up and they seem to have fun, but then they are happy to leave it at that for another few months while they see their other friends weekly/daily according to Facebook). How do I 1. go about meeting new people; and 2. move my friendships to a deeper level? I see other people (at work for example) meet each other and start going on nights out or for lunch, whereas that never happens with me. They are always happy to include me in all the conversations/gossip at work though so it's not like I'm left out, more that it almost seems like they forget to invite me. I'm obviously not making a lasting impression on people, so how do I become someone that others want to spend time with?Has anyone else experienced this?
View related questions:
at work, facebook Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, playitagain-sam  +, writes (30 May 2013):
I think the best thing you can do is make a lot of new friends because that is where it starts. That is how you can meet the right person/people that you'll connect with on a deeper level. Plus you'll have a lot more casual friends.I recently lived in a city where I didn't know another soul, and I began going to different activities groups via online platforms. It sounds awkward and it very scary at first, but I found it very easy to connect with new friends this way. And I feel like I've mastered the skill of talking to random people, which will come in handy in a multitude of situations.Generally speaking I think you bond with new or old friends a lot better when you have unique experiences. Aside from dinner/drinks, try organizing hikes, travel, sports, etc. and do it with your acquaintances.Why not try being the organizer of the events with your colleagues? Seems like they'd be receptive and you can further develop the friendships.Good luck!
|
