A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone. I wonder if anyone can help me here? My fiance proposed to me at the weekend. That night, we consumated the engagement. We didn't realise, until I felt him cumming inside me, that the condom had split. He uses an ultra-thin make so it wasn't that noticable that it had broken. We talked about it afterwards and I told him that I want to be pregnant with his child and be a family because I love him, even though the condom splitting was an accident. But he seems a bit worried about it. We are both financially secure and could afford to have a child, he doesn't seem as enthusiastic as I do. He said he needs to think about it a little but is not completely opposed to the idea. I told him that I want to make love to him without the condom as making love is beautiful and we will be making our family. If I do get pregnant from the accident then I certainly do not want to abort it as I don't believe in it. Am I being too pushy? I don't want to scare my fiance away.
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male
reader, tux  +, writes (26 February 2009):
 Well being pregnant is a pretty scary event, so it could be a variety of reasons. Especially if it's your first child. My wife is currently pregnant with our first child and it's a little nerve-racking but exciting at the same time. But right now, you two are just worrying about something that is not a fact yet. But any which way, good luck.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2009): I'm sure he wants a family with you, hence why he's marrying you otherwise he wouldn't have. This is something that he was thinking will probably happen somewhere down the road, and at this stage he's probably like just getting ready and packed for the trip. But if you become pregnant so soon for him it'll be like the road felt like it didn't want to wait for him to get ready so it decided to drop on top of him in the middle of his preparation... hope all of this made sense.
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A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (26 February 2009):
 I think the prospect of a child so soon is all that is bothering him. He probably wants some "alone" time to you early in your marriage before you start having kids.
I'm sure he would not have a problem if you are pregnant, but try to respect his feelings about not wanting to become pregnant so soon. If you aren't, then I would continue to have protected sex for his peace of mind until you are married.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (26 February 2009):
 I think Deejuliet has it spot on here, it is probably just too soon for your fiancee but in time I'm sure he will be very excited to have a family with you.
While you say you are financially secure, weddings cost a lot of money! Have the wedding of your dreams and then think about a family together, this is the right way to do things.
You are still young and have all the time in the world to have a family, just enjoy your engagement first and enjoy being a young married couple. In the mean time I would suggest you go to the doctors for some kind of birth control (the pill etc) so if the condoms do break you have backup.
Just be patient with your desire for a family, your fiancee clearly does want children with you just not right now.
I hope this helps!
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A
female
reader, deejuliet +, writes (26 February 2009):
 There is a proper 'order' to things. That being get engaged, get married THEN get pregnant. I think that is what is bothering your fiancee. He would rather do things in the proper order. If you happen to accidentally be pregnant from this encounter I think your fiancee will happily accept this. But if not, then it is best to be more careful until you take your vows. Dont start having unprotected sex now just because you WILL be getting married. Wait until the wedding night for that and I think he will be much more confortable. I think he would like to start a family with you, too, just not right now.
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A
male
reader, cupids_friend +, writes (26 February 2009):
Hi I am a 20 year old guy and no I do not think your being to pushy I think you love him a lot and want a family and I think he is just worried I don't think its the fact he does not want a child I just think he is just worried about the whole idea. But no I don't think your being to pushy. But I hope that this helps if not please let me know
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A
male
reader, cupids_friend +, writes (26 February 2009):
Hi I am a 20 year old guy and no I do not think your being to pushy I think you love him a lot and want a family and I think he is just worried I don't think its the fact he does not want a child I just think he is just worried about the whole idea but no I don't think your being to pushy
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