A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey I need some advice, i've been going out with this girl for almost 9 months now and she is in love with me, at one point I thought I loved her too, which I do but i'm not in love with her. We get in fights pretty often over little things, but those little fights just make it that much harder to care about the relationship. I have a hard time looking her in the eyes because it kills me inside to know how much she loves me. To make it even harder, i'm the only good thing she has going in her life right now, her parents don't treat her well nor do her siblings and she has such low self-esteem about everything. I fear that if I left her she would do something terrible. I just want to move on, because as it stands i'm very unhappy being in this relationship. Basically, my question is, should I break up with her now to avoid worst heartbreak, or should I stick it out for her sake? Advice please!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2010): Im in this exact position also. What im planning to do is talk to one of her closest friends and telling her what i am going to do and asking her to help her thorugh the break up. I know that it is going to kill her and i dont wnt her to do anything stupid.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2010): You have yourself in a bit of a pickle friend. A person can always tell when they are in love. When you see or even think about that person you get flustered and nervous. Your heart starts beating faster, and every second with them just isn't enough. When they are in your arms, it feels like time stops and nothing in the world matters but that very moment. If you don't feel any of these with her, its not your fault. Things just end up happening which makes things change. You need to find a way to let this girl down gently, because she adores you. Just tell her exactly how you feel and do your best to help her through all of this. She has family that loves her, and friends to go to, and though it may hurt you, she will eventually move on. It is best to focus on your schooling, and enjoying your teenage years at this age, and having a girlfriend can greatly hinder that and stress you out. Give yourself a good solid week to make the decision, then decide one or the other and dont go back on it. I hope all of this helps you out! btw, can you tell Brett he is a sexy bitch for me? thanks a lot
-Melody
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A
male
reader, TheVirus7429  +, writes (31 December 2009):
 i was in your postion exactly around five months ago, i was the only good thing going for my girlfriend like you. but i was un happy in the relationship but couldnt dump her for fear of her harming herself. eventually after a lot of encouraging from friends i broke up with her, i then realised it was the right thing to do to stop it ending in a massive heartbreak and me being in misery. one month ago i met a girl and have started dating her and am a lot happier in life, my ex girlfriends friends supported her and she got over me eventually without her harming her self. its always the best thing to break up if you dont truly love some one than risk hurting them futher by leading them on
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A
female
reader, wise aunt  +, writes (31 December 2009):
You are a good man for seeking advice.I'm sure she can feel that you don't love her. A man in love acts it and if you are not in love then you most certainly act like a man NOT in love. I bet she is fighting with you because she feels the difference in you, but cant put her finger on what is going on. Rest assured this is adding to her self esteem issues. What you need to do is tell her EXACTLY what you just said. For you to wait, then it will do more dammage.
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A
female
reader, Inasad +, writes (31 December 2009):
 I think that you should break it off now. If you're unhappy, that's what you should be worried about, but you should also stay in her life as a positive person. Help her transition, and just stay a close friend. If she truly loves you, she'll understand and just want you to be happy.
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