A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: "OP Own Title" Hi , i have a girlfreind and have been with her for almost 7 months , i really do love her and she loves me , i trust her 100% and she trusts me, but there are 2 things i hate about this relationship ,because she has big boobs every guy stares at her even oldmen ! , we went swimming the other day and she was in bikini and as we were gettig out this 40 yr old ( he looked 40) stared at her ass so bad and i got sooo angry ! i dont know how to deal with this because i know dirty some guy's minds are , also my girlfreind makes internet freinds and goes on webcam to random people she meets on this game World Of Warcraft i play this myself but plays on private servers, anyway this REALLY gets to me also they flirt with her on MSN and she dosent stop she just doesent say anything back to them when they flirt , i know she doesent get her boobs out for anything but it still really pisses me off :(.im just trying to keep her safe the internet is not safe.How do i deal with these situations?thanks for reading aorry it was long also this is my first time on here.
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female
reader, chigirl +, writes (21 July 2010):
You need to let her handle herself. I get that it bothers you, but as for the internet, it is not your job to keep her safe. That is her parents job, and her own job. Be careful, the line between "protecting" and "controlling" is very thin.
As for the older chaps, why not stand between your girl and the guy next time and glare him into the eyes. If it is the same man over and over you can tell him to keep his eyes to himself, but be careful as this is cause for a fight. And there are too many perverted men out there for you to fend off.
Bottom line is, if it bothers your girlfriend a lot, she needs to stop going to the swimming pool in a bikini and rather wear a swimsuit or not go at all. But all that is up to her, not you. All you can do, and should do, is talk to her about this, and ask her if she gets bothered by the stares. And then, like I said, just place yourself between her and any perverts so they can't look directly at her, or wrap a towel around her. But be discrete. Her body is hers, and if the stares of other men doesn't bother her, she needs to be allowed to continue as she does.
By the way, what you are feeling is jealousy. A little of it is healthy, too much is destructive.
A
female
reader, OhGetReal +, writes (21 July 2010):
Well, there you go, her parents and family disowned her at a young age. This is really bad news for a girl because she is going to try and get male attention any way she can to make herself feel better about herself. Why would any normal parents disown her at a young age? I am not sure I buy that story. Does she act out in other ways? Self harm? Hurt animals? Gets in trouble with the law or is truant at school? Does she still go to school?
I think she needs some counseling ASAP. Talk t your parents about your concerns, tell them what she is doing on the internet, if she lives with you, then they have taken over responsibility for her and they need to reparent her or pay the consequences of her bad choices.
Sounds like a big ol mess to me, her dating you, living with your parents...
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A
female
reader, SarahRussell +, writes (21 July 2010):
If she doesnt get her boobs out, and doesnt reply when guys flirt with her, you have nothing to fear?
Its always nice to meet new people, so your girlfriend having online friends, really shouldnt be a problem for you.
You sound very jealous of this. By agreeing to go out with her, you also agreed not to be a jealous boyfriend. You have been going out with this girl long enough to know she feels the same, so why dont instead of being very jealous and overprotective, you feel proud that these people are staring at her? Try to think of it as, "shes my girlfriend, ive got her" type thing, and feel happy that your girlfriends getting attention because you know shes beatiful yourself, instead of thinking of it as "grrr why dont these guys stop" and getting angry. Because it she finds out how you feel, she wont be happy. Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni forgot to mention she lives with me and her parents and damily disowned her at young age.
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