A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I dated this girl for a while, and I fell in love with her. She also fell in love with me, but she later dumped me because she hated how hurt I always was and she hated the pressure that my depression added to the relationship.It's been about two months.I've been feeling a lot better, and it's been showing.I've been getting over my depression,and we've been doing the whole "best friend" thing pretty well. Now I'm pretty sure she wants me back.I don't know what things would be like if we DID start dating again.Is a relationship where you were both in love something you can just try again?SHOULD I take her back?Any ideas would be very much appreciated.Thank you!
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female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (23 April 2009):
 I don't think you should get back with her. She wasn't there for you when you were going through your problems. A relationship is a two-way street. Both people need to be there for each other. And what if your depression comes back and she leaves you again? How would that feel?
When I was middle school age I used to get depressed a lot, too. You're not alone. In the meantime, to prevent the depression from coming back, why don't you take a vitamin everyday, exercise three times a week (I know people say it all the time, but it really does help), and do anything else that you've been doing that has been helping you get out of your depression.
You don't need a gf who only wants to be with you during the fun times of your life and not there during the bad times.
I know this might sound harsh, judgmental, and I don't fully know the whole situation, but this is just my opinion.
A
female
reader, jessylisa  +, writes (23 April 2009):
if she couldn't deal with your depression the first time what if you get depressed again and she can't handle it?
i'd stay friends.
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A
male
reader, andrew loves hali +, writes (23 April 2009):
 if you really want her back and you know if both of you put effort into it and can make it work then go ahead but on the other hand you guys could break up again and then what would happen? its a 50% chance things will/ will not work out but isn't love all about taking sacrifices for the one you love?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2009): Humans are prone to doubting and questioning the "yes" and "no". If a person chooses either one and it turns out to have a negative consequence, more often than not, that same person may blame the person giving the idea in the first place. If it turns out to have a positive consequence, as with the negative, more often than not, that same person may credit the person giving the idea for good 'judgment'.
This is for every question that has been posted on this web site. This never ending cycling of doubt and the consequences that may lead to regret are ever persistent.
One, do you deny this opportunity and risk the chance to regret it in the future or Two, do you proceed with this opportunity and risk the chance to get hurt 'again' in the future?
On the other hand, One, what if you deny this opportunity and gamble the chance that you may meet someone else that suits you 'better'? Then again, Two, what if you proceed with this opportunity and find out that you two had developed an amazing relationship?
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Should you or should you not?
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A
female
reader, crimson_kiss +, writes (23 April 2009):
 Yes, it is possible to go back and try again. Sounds like you got the major issue taken care of, but be careful not to slide backwards again.
You are going to need her support in this as well. Being the friends you are now sounds like you are enjoying it a lot.
I would say that if you feel ready enough to handle being back into a relationship with her, then go for it....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2009): You would be wise to see a doctor about your depression before getting back in the relationship. Depression can be treated if it is chronic. Was there cause for way you were feeling...did something happen? Or was it something that you didn't know why you were feeling the way you did? There's a huge difference.
As far as the relationship I would leave it the way it is until you are sure. Continue the friendship; let it grow!
The best of luck to both of you!
Britt
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