A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My problem is that i do not know how to talk to girls at all. I recently came out of my first relationship that was 3 years.This relationship was pretty bad as my ex would not allow me to talk with other girls and being young and stupid i went along with this as i loved her and still do.I am getting over her just so you know.But i would like to know how to talk to girls or to make one interested.I do not have an attractive face but i have a very good body. However i am rather short.I have no probelem in saying hi to a girl but i cannot sustain a conversation or make her interested in me. I run out of ideas of what to say after about 3 questions about her and i dont know how to make conversation about anything else.I have the same problem with online chat sites.
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female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (13 June 2011):
 girls love sincere compliments, they like to be asked questions and to have their opinions taken seriously. find out what a girl is interested in and talk about that, if you are also interested in it then great, but if not, you can still talk about it. watch how your mates talk to and chat up girls, learn from the successful ones, research. there are loads of sites that give this sort of advice, try askmen.com for tips on talking to women and dating. have CONFIDENCE in yourself! if you held a relationship together with a girl for 3 years then you must be pretty ok at communicating with a girl
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A
female
reader, lightandshadows  +, writes (13 June 2011):
It is understandable that you will find the situation a bit awkward since you just came out of a long term relationship, and presumably, the last time you dated was before that.However, I think you might find it easier to approach girls if you stop thinking that they're girls and potential "mates" and start talking to them as you would talk to your male friends. If you feel shy or self-conscious people will tend to sense that so you first have to work on being confident about yourself - that is, your physical appearance and other aspects of your personality. Self-confident people tend to give off a vibe which makes them seem interesting.I think it would be best if you didn't go talk to girls with teh specific intention to date, and get to know them first. This will relieve you of some of the pressure. Perhaps it might also help if you hang around with a friend or friends that you trust and meet their girls in their circle of friends. That way if you run out of conversation there would be other people to help you out.I find it is easier to talk to people (that you aren't particularly close to) within a group setting, than one-on-one, because in a group setting conversations hardly ever run out.Good luck! :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2011): Can you speak to your mother, sister, aunt for more than 3 questions? Can you speak to guys easily? Can you speak to female friends?
If you can do any of those things then you're well able to speak to women. Just get rid of this whole thing you have judging women as a suitable partner, you're just putting pressure on yourself to be interesting. Seriously OP, the trick to talking to girls you like is ignore the fact you like them and talk to them like you're talking to your sister. Talk to them like you'd talk to a guy you just met at the bar and are bored. That way you don't put yourself under pressure to perform.
Once you're able to talk to a girl you like for a couple of hours then just add a little flirting, the rest is a piece of cake. Don't worry about being interesting or funny or any of that shit. Just be you, some girls will like you, some just won't. Simple really, stop thinking so hard about it and just relax and so it.
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