A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of 8 years has gone from having some porn on is pc to something like 16 porn sites. I don't mind that, but I’ve found him on a dating site. I challenged him and he's no longer on it, but I have a feeling he's cheating on me. Over the last 12 months his behaviour has changed on and off. He's had calls to his cell phone where I heard him whisper “call me back in a bit." I asked him about it and he says it’s my imagination.Since then he's been very careful not to leave is mobile phone lying around. When he's with me it’s on silent. On the rare occasion that he puts the phone down, I think he does it when he's deleted all evidence. He has disrespected me, insulted my intelligence and was more than ready to ditch me and keep the sites etc. I've heard him thinking aloud, saying, "How do I get out of this 1?" I’ve heard him say it before, but he denies it. He had something on his body he had to tell me about because I will surely see it, would normally tell me, unusual. Do you think he could be cheating? I feel he's taken it 1 step further, searching and email to the mobile phone, text and talk. He deletes emails and generally hides his activity on his pc???? My gut feelings are always right but I don't have concrete evidence which works in his favour.
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male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (5 March 2011):
 Whether he is cheating or not I can see your trust in him is lost and there really isn't a relationship to keep going. I would leave him but don't even bring up cheating because if he isn't it makes you out to be the bad one. Leave him for what ever other reasons, like to do with his behaviour and how you just no longer have those feelings for him.
This will avoid a fight over cheating where things can get ugly and feeling can really be hurt. In the end do you really want to know or would you rather put him behind you because it is your choice regaurdless of his actions?
I had an ex that I am pretty sure was cheating on me but I never found out and it turned out to be really good for me. I wouldn't want to know that for sure and have that blow to my self esteem. Some things are best left unknown.
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (5 March 2011):
 It really sounds like he's cheating. The sudden need to protect his phone, outbursts about you being "crazy," and the dating sites. I'd go with your gut feeling on this.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2011): my ex was into the dating sites. she went on to meet them. there is only one reason you go to them.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 March 2011):
 I say follow your gut feeling. Unless you are usually a really paranoid person then your gut feeling is usually correct. His behaviour is very suspitious and he has all the classic signs of cheating. However from what you say he may have a problem with cyber cheating instead of physical cheating but still both are wrong. So yeah go for your gut instinct.
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