A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am underage for haveing sex be me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 months now and I told him if we get any time alone on him birthday we can do but the thing is.. that it's the first time for both of us and I don't know what to do and also I don't really feel like getting pregnant until I'm out of school so what should I do cuz I do love him. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (6 March 2009):
 Well, before you do ANYTHING, you need to get some education, some knowledge about sex, anatomy, birth control, STIs and pregnancy. This is very important, otherwise you may make choices that will cause you problems in the future. So first thing is to read up on things. I have some links for you to read. Study them until you really kmow your stuff.
Then you have to consider whether or not you are truly ready. If you don't have any idea what to do, then I'm pretty sure you're not ready. I think that's a sign that it's better to wait for now.
If a boyfriend breaks up with you for not having sex with him, he's a pretty crummy boyfriend and a selfish person. You're better off without him. Now, I know you care about him, and everything, but trust us older folk on this point. We know, because we were there once too.
So read this very carefully and at least twice:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/thinking-about-losing-your-virginity.html
Then read this: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/teens/teensex-its-okay-say-no-way-4319.htm
And then this:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/teens/guide-teens-families-4318.htm
Watch this: http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
And know this content inside and out:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
And finally:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/stds-hiv-safer-sex-101.htm
That's a core list of items you need to know before doing ANYTHING. Write down any questions of things you don't understand. Then you should tell your mom that you would like to see the doctor. The doctor can then answer any questions or explain things that are confusing. The doctor can give you a physical exam to make sure you are healthy and have no conditions that would be a problem, and also discuss birth control options. A very important thing for girls who are considering becoming sexually active is to get the vaccine against HPV (human papilloma virus). This vaccination can help prevent cervical cancer later in your life. This is a very important thing to remember, things you do now may come back and hurt you later, both physically and mentally. So it's very important that you are completely educated, protected with birth control and have had a doctor's exam.
I personally think that if you can talk to your mother about this, it's better. This way, she can discuss what the values your family follows mean and why she asks you to do or not do certain things. Your mom was your age once, and understands more than you might think.
So there's your starting points. Get smart first, THEN think about it all over again. Don't make a decision you might regret later.
Take care!
A
female
reader, loving arms  +, writes (6 March 2009):
good answer, I think you and your guy should wait. Your viginity is not something you give away as a birthday present. You sound like you love your boyfriend, When the time is right you wont have to plan a day. it'll happen natrually. Don't rush it mate, you have years ahead of you. Hopefuly time to study, travel and enjoy life before you worry about pregnancy. Enjoy his birthday doing something your ready for. xx
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