A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:my bf and i have been been dating for 4 months but we dated before for 3 months i am a virgin and so is he but he has gone to "second base" and i have not and i just dont feel comfortable moving on to second base and we have had a talk about it and one thing that bothered me was he said "im happy now but i wont always be" and im afraid that he will leave me if i dont feel comfortable in time when he wants to move to the next step. is there anything i can do to make my self more comfortable?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2010): dont stay in a relationship where he implies that hes going to leave if things dont get psycal! I had a boyfriend like that and we did some stuff and he left! I regret that entire relationship and have trouble forgiving myself,.. dont do something you dont want to and if he leaves you for that, be happy you didnt make a huge mistakd!
good luck
A
female
reader, Myrrh  +, writes (25 June 2010):
 Hi. I dont know what you legal age of consent is but i dont think you will be able to "make" yourself comfortable. You will just know when you are ready. Telling you he is happy for now, will just add to the pressure and make you even less comfortable! Sometimes our bodies make up our minds for us. Maybe on some level you arent quite sure if this guy is a keeper or not. So you are holding back and thats fine. I had lots of boyfriends when i was younger but only had sex with one and we got married. So take your time and dont be rushed or pressured into anything. If this guy is a keeper, he will respect you and wait until you are comfy. If hes only interested in sex and he leaves because hes not getting any, then he doesnt deserve you x
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A
female
reader, Myrrh +, writes (25 June 2010):
Hi. I dont know what you legal age of consent is but i dont think you will be able to "make" yourself comfortable. You will just know when you are ready. Telling you he is happy for now, will just add to the pressure and make you even less comfortable! Sometimes our bodies make up our minds for us. Maybe on some level you arent quite sure if this guy is a keeper or not. So you are holding back and thats fine. I had lots of boyfriends when i was younger but only had sex with one and we got married. So take your time and dont be rushed or pressured into anything. If this guy is a keeper, he will respect you and wait until you are comfy. If hes only interested in sex and he leaves because hes not getting any, then he doesnt deserve you x
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