A
female
age
36-40,
*onningKanin
writes:Hello Everyone,My problem is a rather delicate one. I come from a family that is generally very close and we love eachother very much. My problem is that I do not believe in their God(they are Jahovas Witness). In fact I do not believe in any form of religion. I think it causes more harm then good in the world.It took me 20 years to pluck up the courage to tell my grandmother that I didn't believe in the bible and I had a a huge lecture about how it was wrong and about how I was wrong. My mother also gave me the same lecture. I recently told them that I do not believe in their God and my grandmother went nuts.Sometimes I just feel like lieing to save piece and quiet, but I keep feeling smothered by their religion and now my grandmother has all but dissowned me.Anyone been in this situation and have any advise?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2007): Wow, I know exactly how you feel. I have the same exact problem, same religion and everything. My family pretty much disowned me for a while. But now they just accept my decision. I didn't really do anything, we kind of just let the issue go for a while. Unfortunatly they haven't stopped trying to pressure me to go back to being a Witness, and I doubt they ever will, but at least they have accepted that I'm not. My advice, just give it time. Make your feelings known, but don't push it into fights. I'm sorry you are dealing with this, I hope it gets better.
A
female
reader, HonningKanin +, writes (7 June 2007):
HonningKanin is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you everyone that has replied. My grandmother has basically ignored what I have said and is currently on speaking and hugging terms with me again, but I can tell its going to come around again where I am going to have to remind her.I tried talking to her prior and she didn't wanna hear it so I backed off.Anonymous, as much as I appreciate your belief, its honestly just not for me. Its not realy a question of faith more than I think religion is a relic from the past. I feel at the moment, now more than ever, it harms humankind. I respect peoples beliefs, but religion pushes people to the extreme where if you dont believe what they believe someone gets hurt. I believe beliefs should stay beliefs and not be religions. I have my own feelings regarding the afterlife and such, but I do not believe in their god. Not for lack of trying its just never been me.
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A
female
reader, vervada123  +, writes (7 June 2007):
 I know how your feeling. All my family are relativly strict catholics and sometimes i don't believe in God. Your family can't tell you how to live your life. Tell them that u want them 2 respect ur choices that might help. Also you could say that if they r God christains they would respect ur choice. Finally, not meaning to be horriable, but ur Grandma isn't a very God christain if she disownned u 4 ur own choices. Try speaking 2 her calmly bout it and explain ur reasons, tell her u love her very much and coz of that u want her 2 respect ur choices. REMEMBER NO CHURCH ALLOWS PEOPLE BEING FORCED! good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2007): i cant really tell you what to believe in but you did the right thing by telling them. talking about God is a delicate situation. i cant really tell you that ive been in a situation like this before but i can tell you thier was a period in my life when i said thiers no God thiers no such thing as him and i come from a family were we love church were not head over heals for it but we enjoy it. the thing was i saw many horrible things i went through things that i wish i would of been dead and i prayed to God and he never replied to me i lost hope i lost faith but then one of my best friends she introduced me to a band called Barlow Girl and i listened to the song never alone and it made me think alot. thiers this story that gos by a teacher is tired of this girl always speaking about God so she asksthis boy name billy a few questions to prove the girl wrong that thier is not God she goes billy go outside so he went outside do you see the sky? billy replied yes do you see the cloudes? yes do you see God? and he said no so the teacher said then that means hes really not htier what you cant see is not thier. so then the little girl gos can i ask billy a few questions too the teache said go ahead so she goes billy do you see the teacher billy said yes do you see her head he said yes do you see her brain he said no then she said what you cant see isnt really their. all i can tell you is that you have to trust and have a little faith.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (7 June 2007):
 I think it's great to have belief and principles. It's just that when it's about something as controversial as religion it's sometimes better to keep quiet than hurt people for whom religion is a huge part of their lives. I'm not an expert on Jehovahs but from what I know religion is not just something you do on sundays, it's an entire lifestyle and your family probably see what you're saying as a personal attack on the way they choose to live their lives. By all means don't believe in God, I'm 100% with you as far as that goes, but maybe try and keep your opinion to yourself. If they ask what you think tell them that you're unsure at the moment but that you completely respect everyone who chooses to believe. That should pacify them a little bit.
CD
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A
female
reader, Mushgirl +, writes (7 June 2007):
 I just wanna say - good for you for not giving in and for not just going with the flow! Some religious people can be very persuasive and can put you under pressure to believe. It must be hard as they're your family and you're so close - you don't want to upset them. I guess you could just let them think that you believe... it could save the peace, as you said. But if you think there's a possibility that they'll accept that you have a mind of your own, then they might eventually get used to it. Whatever you choose to do, don't let it smother you any more! Mushgirl xxx
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