A
female
age
41-50,
*appyfridays_1
writes:Hello,I'm in a fairly new relationship with this guy and I like him a lot. My sort-of dilemma that's developing is he's clearly into Valentine's Day and is looking forward to doing something special and extravagant, but I'm not a big Valentine's Day person. I'm not that excited about it, but I don't want him to think I'm not interested in him anymore. I'd love to get some advice.Thanks! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (31 January 2008):
 He is playing the main role and you will play the minor role .Just indulge him and have fun.
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (31 January 2008):
 This is an interesting column. Two girls who don't really care for Valentine's Day. I think that's quite refreshing and must be VERY refreshing to the guys to hear a few females who aren't into it. Usually, the shoes on the other foot!
Well, I think that if you know that your guy is into it, it's probably worth putting a little effort into it. It doesn't have to be commercial if you don't want it to be. The whole point is making an effort to express yourself, not buying the Absolutely Ridiculously Overpriced Roses. If there is some special group or saying that you have together, or a special restaurant that you like, a movie that you have been dying to see - it's just about doing it together. I used to make my husband's Valentine by hand out of construction paper, and he still has all of them 30 years later. Get a plain white t-shirt and write on it! Actually, those public gestures are kind of goofy and sweet, girls especially love a guy who makes a fool of himself over her. He'll probably appeciate the effort, no matter what size. It doesn't have to cost much or be over the top, it just has to be personal and heartfelt.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (31 January 2008):
 Hey,
I agree , its a load of old rubbish. A bunch of flowers suddenly becomes worth $150 more than any other day. Its a joke.
None of my friends and their partners celebrate Valentines day as we all think its the biggest commercial ripoff there is and it just preys on people's emotional shallowness to feel they have to prove something to their partner.
But having said that, if he is so into it then I can see no harm in playing along, you don't want to be the party pooper here. But you are entitled to your opinion and you shouldnt have to put on false enthusiasm just because he is into it. I would tell him you are really looking forward to your romantic night out but that you think the whole Valentine thing is not your cup of tea.
If he gets all sulky this might be a good early warning sign in the relationship - you might actually find that he is into it because all the girls in the office have told him he's got to spoil his valentine on the big day.
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A
male
reader, dc.ryan  +, writes (30 January 2008):
 Hello,
Just take it this way; its a nice day out with each other - just with a bit of extra romance thrown in and perhaps a bit of sauciness to finish up afterwards!
Just go with the flow, enjoy his company.. his gestures towards you; treat it like a normal day, but pay extra special attention to him. I think it would be suitable if you did get him at least a Valentines card, to show your appreciation - a small gift too (aftershave or something) - treat him, or just promise him something special later on?
Just sit back and relax..
Ryan
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A
female
reader, Sweety Pie +, writes (30 January 2008):
 I have the same sort of dilemma. Im not particulary excited about Valentines day, and I know my bf is. Whilst my friends are out buying personalised chocolate hearts, im happy just buying a card and going to see a movie. Just make it like any other date, you never know, you might just start enjoying it :) Take care and enjoy! xx
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